GRATEFUL THAT LIFE IS CALM

I am grateful to the Almighty because my life is calm.

My life is peaceful and quiet.

I am doing all of my chores and I am having fun.  There are no strategies that I need to use for my survival.  I'm getting enough sleep too.  I am balancing work and play.

Yesterday, for example, I washed floors and paid bills and mailed them at the post office.  I went to therapy too.  I made chicken for dinner and found the time to see Mama Mia.....Here We Go Again at the library in the evening.  I read, texted and spoke to friends.

Today Dom is coming to discuss finances and I will go food shopping.  I will also read my book, watch television and meditate.

I am grateful because the Almighty has given me a calm life.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR UNDERSTANDING WHAT TRIGGERS DO

I am grateful to the Almighty because through therapy I now am beginning to understand triggers, what they do to me and how to handle them.

Yesterday was a wonderful day.  I had lunch out with the ladies and then went to a book discussion at the Plainview library.  I picked up a ring at Solomon Jewelers. In the evening I had dinner with other friends and invited my friend Margie to a Sisterhood Book Club meeting.

However, there were triggers in my day and I handled them.  My brother who made phone calls and left messages telling me NOT to call him back arrived at my house in the morning unannounced.  I thought quickly and said that I had a bathrobe on and was going to take a shower.  He said the same thing as the phone messages.........that he was doing his bathrooms and would be very very busy.  He left.

I then thought about how his behavior gives validity to the abused way that I was treated.  

I received a video from Hilary showing Remi walking in the park with my son-in-law and his parents.  When I babysat on Tuesdays, I was left alone and Izzy went to the movies.

I asked Hilary how we would spend her birthday and heard that she was spending weeks after her two day trip to Florida relaxing.

I did feel sadness and acknowledged it.  I did feel a stomach ache and acknowledged it.  I kept moving on with my on life and showing myself compassion.

I am understanding how depression is right under the surface and how to handle it.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR WALKIG FORWARD

I am grateful to the Almighty because I am walking forward.

Yesterday I had lunch with my friend Leslie who owns Absolute Yoga.  I'm going to do a private lesson with her tomorrow as I move back into taking yoga classes.

Today I'm having lunch with my friends before the book discussion at the Plainview library. Tonight I'm having dinner with other friends before the Sisterhood Book Club.

Life is coming back thanks to the Almighty.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL BECAUSE I AM FREE OF MY ABUSERS

I am grateful to the Almighty because I am free of my abusers.

I can enjoy my life to the fullest.

I try to.

I speak to friends, make plans and even my chores are fun.

It's as though a weight has been taken off my shoulders.

This past weekend I had dinner with Jay.  I went to Weight Watchers.  I got a pedicure.  I finished my book.  I cleaned.

No one abused me.  I enjoyed each and every moment.  Matzah Brie enjoys having everyone at the house too.

Today I'm having lunch with my friend Leslie.  My intention is to get myself back to yoga.

Life is good.

I am grateful to the Almighty for allowing me to breathe.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL BECAUSE I AM HAPPY

I am grateful to the Almighty because I am happy.

I have never really had this feeling before.  I was happy to be going somewhere, or getting something BUT I have NEVER been truly happy just because I feel that way.  It's an awesome feeling!!

For the first time in my entire life I am not being abused!!!!!!   I have no strategies.  I'm not keeping myself safe.  I'm just enjoying the world calmly.  I am content and at peace.

Thank you Almighty!!

I am grateful!!

GRATEFUL BECAUSE I AM IN CHARGE OF MY LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty because FINALLY I am in charge of my life.

You are helping me to make decisions and my abusers are gone!

I am loving it.

Thank you!!!

GRATEFUL FOR MY WONDERFUL NEW MORNINGS

I am grateful to the Almighty for the wonderful mornings that He has given me.

I no longer have to live in fear.  I no longer have to creates strategies for survival and safety.

I no longer have to dress by eight o'clock and race out of the house to walk at The Home Depot or outside and then rush to yoga to avoid an attack.

I am no longer starred at in the morning without being spoken to.

I no longer hear, "Good Morning, Ellen."

My abuser is dead.

I awake happily and decide when to get up in the morning quietly and peacefully.  Matzah wakes beside me as I give him Reiki, brush him, feed him and let him out.  I go to the driveway to pick up the papers and bring in water.

I text G'morning to some friends and the girls.

I eat breakfast watching my new television and then read the papers as long as I want to.

I love my new mornings.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.