Thank you Almighty for my developing insight.
Last night, he and I went to Cinema Arts to see a film entitled, Let My People Go!!! The director was there for a Q & A and there was a reception afterwards. It was a wonderful foreign film and I laughed my head off. I haven't laughed in a long time.
I was so happy that I ate and drank the cheese, crackers, cookies and wine and gained weight this morning, although I still weigh less than I should, but only by 2 pounds.
He wasn't very happy at the reception. He blamed my comment about having to do the bathroom again because he hadn't cleaned it well the day before. He did not get a response from me because there was no need for one. Remember, this is the new me. I could see that he wasn't very happy.
I remember how he told me that his goal in life was to make me unhappy. These are his words. He said that he isn't a happy person and it would make him happy to upset me.
I had written a shopping list and I wanted to know if we were going out to dinner/movie on Saturday. He is not happy making these decisions because then he only has himself to blame. He has verbalized this to me. I already knew the answer and didn't care. That's why I could eat all those things at the reception.
He said that we should eat at home because he didn't want to be rushed. I agreed. I told you that I knew this already. This also didn't sit well with him.
He is a keeper of money. He has no joy in its spending. I like to enjoy and spend. With this in mind, I asked if, with the Spring like weather, we were going out east to look for another condo since he hates the one we have.
I already knew the answer and had made plans for myself. He said that he didn't think so because he hadn't gotten the check yet. Again, I disappointed him by agreeing. This wasn't what he wanted to do. However, I had already realized, a few days ago, that he never called a broker to set anything up. I was gong to walk, do yoga, possibly go to Weight Watchers and relax. I never told him this, but, since I knew his decision beforehand, I had another plan.
It is my quiet insight that has allowed me to study him and respond quietly in an appropriate manner. Even when he criticizes me, I let it fall flat. It's not worth it. He's not worth it.
Thank you, Almighty for this insight. It took a long while, but, better late than never.
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