Today, my Shabbos was a beautiful day. The services at synagogue were uplifting. My friends made plans to go out to dinner on Thursday night at 7PM. I'm looking forward to it. I gave him some chores to do because otherwise he thinks up things to carry on about.
And no, when I got home from services, I didn't want to walk with him and the dog. How many years have I walked alone? My feeling is, get used to it, like I had to.
When I got back from walking he wanted to tell me about a young couple and I wasn't interested. Why? Because I've always been at the bottom of the food chain and I elevated myself and I don't care anymore. So I said that I didn't care because my time in this neighborhood has come and gone. It's a nice neighborhood, but "my mistakes" destroyed it. And I said something to the effect that those two had abused me and his answer was, " I don't care who abused you!"
So why would I be grateful? It's because I knew the hatred that lurks beneath him and I was prepared. Prepared not to give a damn and just enjoy the day.
Now, I'm off to afternoon services and I'm grateful to the Almighty for giving me the strength to succeed.
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