• Each morning I forced myself to think of three things to be grateful for before letting my feet hit the carpet. If I didn’t do this, I would begin my day in the depressed way I had ended the night before. Soon I began doing this before bed and found that nights got easier.
• When the magnitude of my situation would hit mid day, I forced myself to get outside, go for a walk and notice something beautiful. When life is bleak even the smallest gifts like the song of a bird or color of the sky can jar you up a notch.
• I listened to or read something inspirational daily. I couldn’t control the world around me but I could control my inner emotions. Yes I cried a lot, but I balanced those moments with what I was grateful for and kept moving towards what I wanted—stability again.
• If I felt desperate and scared, I would imagine my worst case scenario: I would loan my dog and cat to people I trusted and couch surf, I would go on antidepressants, I would ask a friend if I could share dinner with them. Once I knew my worst case scenario, I was able to relax a tiny bit and focus on what I was grateful for~often times the worst case scenario back up plan or the fact my dog was laying there next to me loving me no matter what.
When life blows up there is a crystal clarity that comes:
• All of the issues you’ve been hiding behind with your job or your money or your relationship are out there in the open.
• In the middle of the night, I learned to pray for help and finally learned to listen for the answer.
And in the end, most of all I learned that when we’re broken, we’re really just broken open.
I became the seed that sits in the dark, damp earth waiting for spring, deciding in which direction to send up a sprout. When life unravels, we’re all that seed needing to trust that the darkness we’re residing in temporarily, will in the end move us towards our next fertile direction.
No comments:
Post a Comment