I am grateful to the Almighty because I was able to survive a very difficult day with him.
Before the Jewish holidays, I go to the cemetery. This is what my parents taught me to do. He drives me because I don't do highways and the cemetery is in New Jersey. He then goes to his parents cemetery, also in New Jersey because the scale must be balanced. He was not brought up like this.
I keep all the cemetery information in a folder and bring it with me. It has MAP QUEST directions from one cemetery to the other which he downloaded. He was supposed to review the directions to his cemetery while I was at my family site.
He did not do so but programed the GPS incorrectly and got terribly lost. I was rather quiet for the entire trip preferring not to be in the line of sight in a car after yesterday.
Instead of taking responsibility for his actions, he blamed me, telling me that he won't go with me next year and I should go with my brother. I was trapped in a car with him and I again used my little voice. I texted a friend and my daughters to let them know what he was up to.
He didn't like that at all preferring to be abusive in private. The girls were quite proud of me and encouraged me to also use laughter as a technique which I did.
Upon coming home, he began again to banter about my friends. He was looking for anything to get a rise out of me. Again, there was failure.
I did tell him that I didn't think it was a good idea for us to look for a new condo considering the way he handles pressure.
This did not sit well with him.
He accused me of not wanting to retire. He told me that this was not a marriage. Anything to get a rise out of me. I told him in a quiet voice that I would not be manipulated into raising my voice so he could call 911.
I responded in my quiet little voice that if today was any indication of retirement, I would continue to work.
I'm proud of myself.
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