I MADE IT THROUGH THE RAIN!!!!

I am grateful to the Almighty because I made it through the rain.

I am proud of my accomplishments.  I have let go of my disappointments.  I have learned that it is not always necessary to speak.  I am so proud of me.

I am grateful to the Almighty because He made this happen for me.  He has always been there for me.

Today I went to services with a sense of pride and joy.  Everyone was delighted that my older one is engaged.  I'm glad that she knows who her father is.

I came home to text, talk to friends, walk and read, not necessarily in that order.

I home to take the dog to the park.

I have joy!!!  I have energy!!  I will have a good day.

Thank you, Almighty for always being there for me.

I am grateful!!!!

GRATEFUL FOR MY NEW LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty for the new life that I have just begun to live.

It is amazing.

I walked for two hours early early in the morning because I could!!!!    Then I attended not 1 but 2 yoga classes, Restorative and a wonderful Level 1 class. I bought my challah for Shabbos and did assorted other errands.   I just finished breakfast with DD coffee.  I really read both newspapers.

Now I'm on my way to get a manicure/pedicure.  I'm very excited.  This is a vacation.

The situation between him and his daughter is not good.   The boyfriend was upset at how rude he was.  Although he apologized I'm sure that my daughter now understands what a father he is.  The beautiful thing is that it isn't my problem and he is left having to apologize to someone he dislikes.   All I can do is smile and enjoy my life.

More later...................................

I missed a surprise retirement breakfast thrown by the curriculum supervisor because I took today off.  I was sad about that but I really need to burn out some days.

I called friends to tell them of my daughter's engagement.

He is trying so hard to have a confrontation with me and is failing because I am usin my cute little voice.  I'm proud of me.

It will be Shabbos soon.  I have made a delicious dinner.

Tonight I will read my book.

I am grateful to the Almighty for my new life.  It is amazing.

GRATEFUL FOR STRENGTH AND JOY

I am grateful to the Almighty because he has made me a strong woman.   I am grateful because I am experiencing such joy in my life.

It is going to be difficult being around him as I saw yesterday.   The thought even crossed my mind that I had made a mistake in retiring.  Then I quickly perished the thought.   He is what he is.  I did not discuss his temper tantrum in Apple because that would have given him much more fuel.  I just concentrated on my joys.

That's the way it will be.

I joyfully took home a new laptop that was paid for by me!!!!  I signed up for lessons!!!   I'm proud of me!!!!!

I did get to read my book and now I'm busy reading, for Great Books, for the Yoga Book Club and for Sisterhood.

The day is beautiful and I will walk when I get home.

The older daughter did get engaged.  I get an "A" for acting.  He told me that he feels like dying.  His life didn't work out.   I can't tell you how happy I am because now he can't bully and his little princess has escaped!!!!

Life is good and I am embracing it.

I am grateful to the Almighty for the joy in my life.

GRATEFUL FOR ANOTHER "VACATION DAY"

I am grateful to the Almighty because I took anther "vacation day" off.  

It is getting so that the supervisors clap when they see me at work.

This is my accomplishment.  I have had a wonderful career.  I will get a nice pension, Social Security and then I will enjoy my own life.

I had a brief thought when I heard of the tragedy that perhaps I should not have retired. However, I always used a school, even as a child to hide in.  It's time to move on and change.  I will take baby steps and learn to do this.  It's time to enjoy my own life!!!  It's time to give up the false dreams that I created!!!!!

Today I will walk even though its dreary outside and looks like rain.  I will attend my Yoga Book Club.  My intention today is to purchase a new computer.

I am grateful to the Almighty for this "vacation day."  

I will succeed.  I will move on and have my own joyful life.

Thank you, Almighty.

Later-  The boyfriend called to ask if he received the e-mail to marry her.  He says that the was nasty to bf.  He certainly was in a miserable mood today.  He even yelled at me and I smile as I write this, because do you think that I care???   
              
             My Yoga Book Club was wonderful.   AND I BOUGHT A NEW LAPTOP for over $2000.  I didn't bat an eyelash.  My first lesson is Sunday at 5PM.  I'm proud of me.

I am grateful to the Almighty for this wonderful day!!!

GRATEFUL FOR LEARNING TO LET IT GO IN YOGA

I am grateful to the Almighty for learning to LET IT GO in yoga.

The news of a wedding shocked me.  I couldn't help thinking of all the rotten memories that I have of her.  Now this!!!!  I was up a lot saying my mantras.

I realized that this does not concern me at all.  I let go of her years ago after she decided that other families, other mothers, other religions were more suitable for her.  She was only good at having me pay for things that the others had.  The man she will mary has no real job.  It is my job to make sure that I am not the money man.

Since I never had her it will be simpler to let go.  I will not create a dream like I did with him.  There is no basis of reality to this.  It is only in my mind.

I have decided to detach and not discuss it at all.

I am grateful to the Almighty for bringing me to a place where I learned how to let go.

GRATEFUL THAT SHE GOT HERS

I am grateful to the Almighty because what goes around comes around.

It looks like the boyfriend wants to marry her.  He sent him an e-mail asking permission.  What a joke!!!  They live together.  It's putting the cart before the horse.  He is upset.  I don't give a damn for many reasons.  She was a rotten child and an even worse rotten teenager.  All she did was break my heart and now she will get hers.

Thank you Almighty.

What goes around comes around.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL TO THE ALMIGHTY

I am grateful to the Almighty for all of my blessings.

I had a wonderful four, yes four day weekend.  I did so many wonderful things.  I have a sense of accomplishment, joy and inner peace.   I made it through the rain.  I am grateful to the Almighty for this.

He doesn't say anything joyful or positive and I realized the reasons for this.  His victim has escaped.  I no longer react to anything negative that he says.  He tries to create fear (I could wind up on dialysis if I eat that), negativity (Lets's do this except, lets not....) sadness ( No good morning).   All of these are facts but I go about my business with a smile.  We have no pleasant memories to talk about.  There is none of the, "remember when we did that"?  For me the memories are all negative.  Remember when you made me cry, you cursed my family, you insulted me..............?

I am celebrating myself.  I survived. I'm proud of me.  I made it through the rain.  

As far as the condo goes, he has a problem.  He is paying all the bills and needs to find another one.   The people screwing him are just like him.  He has met his match. This is not my problem.

I am grateful to the Almighty for my life, my blessings, my joys, my goodness and gladness. The Almighty has been there for me.

Today, I went to work. Tomorrow I will take off.  They know that I am burning out days.  I will read the last book for Great Books.  I will walk.  I will go to my Restorative Yoga Class.

I am grateful to the Almighty for my life.

GRATEFUL FOR MY NEW LIFE!!!!

I am grateful to the Almighty for my new life.

I'm so proud of me.   I know exactly what to do and what to say and to whom to say it to keep myself safe.

I am using mindfulness to keep me in the present.  There is no sense in reviewing the story, nor creating another one.

Dinner was excellent last night.  We went to Morrison's and I kept my conversation very light. We came home to watch an HBO film called,  The Normal Heart, a history of the early AIDS disease.

Today I will walk for my usual two hours. I'm going to see if I can find the Memorial Day Parade on Old Country Road.  I will let you know later.  I would love to relax in the backyard.  I never get to do that.  I would love to read. 

We will see about dinner.

I feel like a small child, anticipating summer.  The exception is that in a short month, June 27 to be exact, I will have summer forever.   I always knew that June 27 had value.

Thank you, Almighty for my new life.

Later-   I found the Memorial Day Parade.  It was awesome to watch.  Then I continued my walk and found my Matzah taking a walk too.  He was delighted to find me, but I went my separate way to continue my walk,  I came home and we went to the dog park.  He made a negative comment about my retirement which I chose to ignore, something about how it will be with you around.

I started cleaning a closet.  Then I decided to get color and teach myself mindfulness so I went outside and relaxed on a chair listening to music for one hour.  I decided to bathe the doggie.  Now I am going to read.

Dinner will be home tonight.

I feel like a child on a perpetual vacation.   I am celebrating my successes.

Thank you, Almighty for my new life.

GRATEFUL FOR A BEAUTIFUL DAY!!!!

I am grateful to the Almighty because I am having a wonderful day.

We watched Mary Poppins last night.   It brought back memories of having seen the movie with my first love, Barry Weiss.

This morning, I walked for 2 hours on a glorious day.  I mailed the movie and then went to yoga. I took a beginners class, but really enjoyed it.   I did errands and picked up DD coffee.  I read both newspapers.  I did some cleaning.

And I got to put sunscreen on and lay out with my pooch and get color.

We are talking about going out to dinner.

And we went to Morrison's.  I made that happen.  My dinner was wonderful and now for the HBO film.............

Thank you Almighty for a beautiful day.

GRATEFUL FOR BEING SAFE

I am grateful to the Almighty for teaching me what to do so that I could feel safe in my own home and retire.

Living with him has been difficult, if not impossible.  However, it was a choice that I made. I delayed retirement for a long time because I didn't feel safe in my own home.  This culminated on July 31, 2012 with his horrible action.  He denies doing it.  He never apologized.  

I knew that I had to change myself.  I certainly did.  I did so well that I can now retire and feel comfortable in my own home.

I am happy because I know exactly what to do in order to remain safe.   I have a life filed with activities and friends and I am happy.

Yesterday, he didn't say one word to me until the Sabbath dinner.   I was content and happy and knew what to do.

Today I went to services.   I hung out with friends at the kiddush.  I will walk.  I will be on the computer.  I will read.  I will do some more needed cleaning.

I am grateful that the Almighty has helped me become safe so that I can retire.

I am looking forward to new adventures.

GRATEFUL FOR DETERMINATION AND WILL

I am grateful to the Almighty for giving me the qualities of determination and will.

I took another day off from work today.  I walked and hopefully if it doesn't rain, I will be able to walk for another hour.   I went to not one, but two yoga classes,  Restorative and a Level One class.  They were awesome.  I'm getting to know two ladies in the class and they are getting to know me.  Both were in education and that makes it wonderful.

In the Level One class, Leslie spoke of the two sides of life, determination and will and ease and relaxation.  I was amazed.  All my life I had to be determined and be willful so that I would succeed.  Now with retirement, I can be at ease and enjoy my life.  Life will be a vacation.  I'm going to have to think about that because that concept is very new to me.   However, I was overjoyed because I made it!!!!

I picked up the two dresses that I bought at Cindi's.  They had to be altered.  I am proud to say that I will wear one to my retirement party.   I also made a new ring with my mother's diamond that I picked up today.  It's beautiful!!!!

DD coffee and the newspapers were wonderful.   I am now going to clean out a dresser and hopefully after that be able to walk for an another hour if the weather holds.

Thank you, Almighty for making me a determined and strong willed woman because with your help I accomplished a great deal.  I'm celebrating my accomplishments on this Sabbath.

GRATEFUL FOR MAKING IT THROUGH THE RAIN

I am grateful to the Almighty for being there for me as I slowly made it through the rain.  There were times that I thought that I would drown but He did not let this happen.

The younger one came yesterday.  She was late so that I was able to go to my yoga class.  She was late because she went for a manicure/pedicure at the place I go to.  She was in a wonderful mood.  This was quite different from the day before.  She was told to find another school and she is doing just that.  We went out to dinner and she slept over and left this morning.

I know that I'm supposed to be mindful and live in the moment.  I do. However, I couldn't help thanking the Almighty for helping me make it through the rain as I remembered what horrible experiences I had with both of them.  Th example of the way in which he pulled me out of the computer chair to give her the computer came to mind.   I am so grateful that the Almighty was always there for me to comfort me, protect me and move me forward.

Today I came to work and yes I will work.   Tomorrow I will take off as I have two yoga classes that I want to take and closets and drawers that are calling my name.   Yesterday, I cleaned out the music room and I'm ready to start the closets.

This afternoon I will walk at Home Depot as it is raining.  My financial planner is coming to work on my investments.   I will start the second of the Great Books for the conference.

Thank you Almighty for always being there for me.

GRATEFUL FOR MY STRENGTH AND FORTITUDE

I am grateful to the Almighty because He has given me tremendous strength and fortitude.

My life is just wonderful!!!!  I am excited about retirement.

I came home at a regular time and was able to walk for 2 hours.  No longer do I have to service everyone.

Last night I took a Restorative Yoga class and exchanged phone numbers with a  yoga friend who lives nearby.  New things are beginning to happen to me.

The younger one is having problems at work. The Principal told her to look for another school.  I'm not surprised.  She never wanted to fit in or follow rules.   She will be coming here to upset us.  She wants to sleep over.  I am going to have to be strong in this instance.  I can't make everyones problem my own and I'm not going to. 

Today I took off another day.  I want to burn some of my days out.  I planned a very nice day and intend to enjoy it.

It's going to rain later and I'm going to walk early.  

Thank you, Almighty for my strength and fortitude.

Later!!!!   I had an amazing day.  I walked for 2 hours on a glorious morning,  I texted friends and was on the computer.   I did all of my errands.  I laminated my Medicare Card and the letter that Chris wrote to CO accepting my resignation.   I ordered a beautiful ring using my mother's diamond that I will be proud to wear.  I cleaned out the music room.  She has not arrived yet and Im off to yoga.

GRATEFUL FOR MY SUCCESSES

I am grateful to the Almighty for all of my successes.

I decided to go to work today.  Why not???  As i was walking in to the building I reviewed the history of my career.  I realized how grateful I am to the Almighty for making this career possible.   

It started with my parents who trashed my self-esteem.  The Almighty made sure that I succeeded in school and upon graduation, I was placed in the best district in the city. I don't have to tell you about all the abuse that I suffered at his hands.   Upon my mothers death,  I got a job at Lincoln Hall where I rose from teacher to Principal and met my friend, Carl.  When that closed, Carl told me about BOCES.  I was hired here and did so many things that I am proud of.  I taught,  I did overnights, I worked summer school at Jones Beach and I became the Curriculum Coordinator for the last 9 years.

I went to work despite everything that happened to me.   Work helped me to survive it all.  It was the Almighty who helped me to find these positions, these friends and led me to this life.

Then there was July 31, 2012.   The Almighty was frustrated with me because I saw but didn't see.  As a result of what happened that night,  I changed into the "me" that I am today.

It is time for me to leave "work" and to "play."  

Thanks to yoga,  I know how to handle him.

I can't wait for my new life to begin.

Thank you, Almighty for all that you have done for me.

GRATEFUL FOR THE DAY

I am grateful to the Almighty for this wonderful day.

It is beautiful outside.  I have decided to go to work Monday and Tuesday and take off Wednesday to go to the Yoga Book Club.  Excellent plan!!!

Today I will go to the bank to pay for my safety deposit box.  I also want to take out my mother's diamond and make it into a ring that I will wear.

I can't wait to walk.  It's beautiful outside.

I also have to phone Dom Noya to change the time for our meeting on Thursday to later as I want to attend my Memory Workshop.

I am grateful to the Almighty because I have learned so much from yoga.  I let go what I choose not to say and that makes my life so much more remarkable.

Thank you, Almighty!!!!!

As a side note, I should tell you that on this day 4 years ago in 2010 my life changed as his brother found a hospital for him to go to and I was all alone.  I am grateful to the Almighty for how far I have come!!!!!

GRATEFUL FOR MY ACCOMPLISHMENTS

I am grateful to the Almighty for my many accomplishments.

I hope that the Almighty will help me to stop reviewing my disappointments.  The crazy thing is that this will happen in the middle of the night.  That's a time that I am more emotional and these memories come right in to upset me.   Yesterday, he found a nice condo in Southampton in the Dan's newspaper.  He has me paying the common charges and when we sell our condo then he will get the money.   I started to review all my memories of condo life with him.  That's what kept me up.  Then other memories flooded in.....................

Today I will be joyful.   I'm going to walk soon wearing yoga clothes in the early morning air because I have a Level 1 yoga class at nine.

I will do some errands.  I enjoy Fresh Produce.   I will gas up the truck and go to DD.  I plan to read my newspapers.    I am really enjoying the new book for the Syosset Book Club.  I have never read Sherlock Holmes!!!!!

Today is the day that I go to the Walt Whitman Mall to the Apple Store to choose a new computer because the one that I'm typing on belongs to BOCES and when retire I must return it.

I'm not sure if I want to go out to dinner or not.  That's undecided as of now.

Later-  This was a wonderful day filled with so many accomplishments.  I did everything that I wanted to do and I might add, did it joyfully.  Joy was also the theme of our yoga class.  I chose a laptop at the Apple Store when I hand in this laptop.  I am grateful for everything that  learned about computers from this laptop.

I also bought a new Spring/Summer Michael Kors bag.

I am making tuna on the George Forman tonight!!!

And yes, I will go to work tomorrow.  I'm thinking Monday and Tuesday with Wednesday off for the Yoga Book Club.

GRATEFUL FOR THE ALMIGHTY'S FAITH IN ME

I am grateful to the Almighty for HIS faith in me.

I keep thinking about the fact that I am retiring and I am beyond happy.   I have gotten over the nostalgia and am now jumping up and down for joy!!!!!

I was at services this morning which I greatly enjoyed.  I love the prayers and speaking to my synagogue friends.

I will walk on this beautiful day.   Later I will take Matzah to the park.

I am celebrating my accomplishments and the Almighty's faith in me.

Thank you, Almighty!!!!!

GRATEFUL BECAUSE I MADE IT!!!!

I am grateful to the Almighty because with His help I made it!!!!

I'm trying to burn out some of my "sick" days as I will not be paid for them when I leave.

Today I took one of those days and if retirement is going to be like this, it will be like going to heaven.

It was my usual Friday plan when I'm on vacation.   I walked at Home Depot because it was raining.  I took 2 yoga classes. Yes, two......not one.   I took Dawn's Restorative Yoga class and Leslie's Level 1 class.  On the way home, I bought a challah for Shabbos and DD coffee which I had with the newspapers at breakfast.

Then it was off to get another hombre manicure and pedicure.

It's not as if I didn't do my chores.  I gave Matzah his medication for allergies.  I straightened up.  I did a wash.  

However, this is like being on vacation.

He didn't bother me at all.  If he had, I would not have responded.

I'm so going to love this.

Thank you, Almighty for helping me to make it!!!!

GRATEFUL FOR YOGA

I am grateful to the Almighty for sending a friend to convince me to begin yoga so many years ago.

I walked yesterday for 1 1/2 hours outside.  It was a beautiful day.

Then I went to my Level 1 Yoga class.   Leslie spoke of something so profound that I will remember it always.    She talked about how to bring yoga into the way you think and how you speak.  Budda talks about thinking before you speak and asking yourself the following questions:

l. Are you telling the truth???
2. Are you kind in what you will say?
3. Is what you are saying necessary??

The last question made such an impact on me that I will remember it forever.  I related it to him. Is what I am saying necessary to say to him?  

Yesterday, I came home to silence.   He was reading the paper and didn't even bother to say hello.  I imagine that was his way to set me up for a confrontation.   I was silent also.  When he began to speak, I spoke.  That took a while.   I went to walk.  He and Dana went to the body shop.  At yoga, I heard Leslie speak.   It made a major impact on me.

We took Dana out to dinner and he was appropriate.   He turns everything on and off and I'm supposed to react.  I don't.  

It does make an impact on me.   I am planning my retirement carefully so as not to get overly involved with him.

Today, I will walk, read and bring my new dresses to the tailor to have them shortened.  He will take the dog to the vet to see about his rash.  Matzah has many allergies and his food probably has to be changed.  

I am grateful to the Almighty for sending me yoga.  I have learned so much from it.

GRATEFUL FOR MY STRENGTH

I am grateful to the Almighty because He has made me a strong person.

I had a wonderful day yesterday.  I am going to love retirement.  I did a lot of fun things.  It felt as if I was on vacation!!!   I walked for 2 hours when I wanted to.  I read newspapers slowly with DD coffee.  I was able to complete my book.  I was able to start the next one.  I really enjoyed my book club discussion last night.  I was so excited to find a beautiful dress to wear to my retirement party.  I framed the wonderful letter that Chris gave me.  I made a manicure/pedicure appointment for Friday.  I spoke to a gentlemen named Herb from Senior Advisors of Nassau Community College.  He explained the registration process to me.  Papers came from BOCES and I am up to date.  I even went to the eye doctor and thanks to the Almighty, my checkup was fine.

I'm in the process of creating a daily schedule for myself. 

It's a strange time for me.  I have mixed emotions about leaving.  I am very nostalgic about my career because I loved it so.  On the other hand, I am aware that I can't continue to hide out in a school and I want the next adventure to start.  This has led to joy, happiness and crying too!!

He is taking advantage of my mixed emotions to start arguments about nothing.  It doesn't take much for it to fully escalate into a major confrontation and that would be his joy. I wouldn't know what happened and he would be delighted.  I'm glad that I took off yesterday because I am now aware of this and will be careful.  That is my strength.

I am at work today.  I plan to walk after work and to read today.  I am taking a yoga class too.  Dana is coming because someone banged into her car yesterday and she and he will go to a body shop.   I invited her to go out to dinner.

Thank you, Almighty for making me a strong woman!!!!!

GRATEFUL FOR THE DAY!!!

I am grateful to the Almighty for giving me this day.

I took another day off from work.   I am on the computer now and soon will be walking for only one hour because I have an eye doctor appointment this morning.

I hope and pray that all goes well.

In the afternoon,  I want to go to Cindi's and see if they have a dress for my retirement party.  I can't believe that I just wrote that!!!!   Wow!!!   I will finish my walk,  read my book and the newspapers, drink DD coffee and enjoy.

Tonight I have a book discussion group.

Thank you Almighty for this day.

Later-   My eye checkup went well.  I read my newspapers.  I completed my 2 hour walk.  I had DD coffee and read my book.  I am going to frame Chris's wonderful letter to me and head to Cindi's.

RETIREMENT PAPERS ARE BEING WORKED ON...............

I am grateful to the Almighty because my retirement papers are being worked on by the state.

I was notified by mail and will receive my first pension check at the end of July.

Wow!!!

I also received a catalogue to be a senior observer at Nassau Community College.

Wow!!!

I came home and walked 2 hours.

Wow!!!

Everyone is still getting along.

Wow!!!!

Thank you, Almighty for all of this!!!!

I RECEIVED 100%

I am grateful to the Almighty because I received 100% on my examination.

I was so proud of myself yesterday.

I walked.  I went to yoga.  When I came home he was in an uproar because he didn't want to go to LIC.   He was arguing with them.  I kept out out it.   I have so learned to think of myself that as he tried to pull me in, I used my quiet voice not to say anything.

He hates the boyfriend.   The boyfriend was meeting us for dinner.  He would have to pay as this fellow ordered everything on the menu.   He was furious.  I kept out of this too.

I had a wonderful day.  The art museum was wonderful.  The park was delightful.  The dinner was delicious.   I received presents from both of them!!   And from him!!!  It was as it should have been years ago.  Yoga taught me not to live in the past.  I celebrated the day.

I RECEIVED 100%.

Today, I'm at work.   It's beautiful outside.   I will walk later.

I wil celebrate myself.

Thank you, Almighty for always being there for me!!!!!

GRATEFUL FOR ANOTHER TEST

I am grateful to the Almighty for placing another test in front of me.

If I do well, I will be ready for retirement!!!!!

Today is Mother's Day.   I am spending it with the triad.  Need I say more??  However, I must live in the present.  The past will make me depressed.  The future will give me anxiety.

I'm going to see if I have internalized all the yoga I took.

I'm off to walk and do yoga.

Happy Mother's Day to me.

The test begins...........................................................

Thank you, Almighty for placing this test in front of me.

GRATEFUL THAT I ACHIEVED SUCCESS!!!!

I am grateful to the Almighty because I have achieved success!!!!

I have made it through the rain.  I am a totally different person as a result of the things that have happened to me.

With the Almighty's help, I made it through the rain!!!!

I am looking forward to retirement.

Thank you, Almighty!!!!!

GRATEFUL BECAUSE I MADE IT!!!!!

I am grateful to the Almighty because with His help, I made it through the rain.

The trials that I faced were tremendous.   There was no joy in raising them nor in the marriage.  However, with the Almighty's help, I forged forward and made it through the rain.

I got my hair colored and blown out yesterday.   We did go out to dinner.

Today is the beginning of Sabbath.

I am still flying with joy!!!!

Thank you, Almighty for making this happen.

GRATEFUL FOR THE NEW ME

I am grateful to the Almighty for creating the new me.

I am so happy.

I finished putting my Spring Closet together and wouldn't you know it??  It's rainy and cold today and I'm still in winter/spring clothes.

I had a wonderful time at dinner last night with my Sisterhood friends.  I really enjoyed the book club too.  Now that I will be retired it will be easy to facilitate book discussions.

I thought of him too.  I am indeed smiling as I write this.  He spent yesterday being very quiet and I did too while I was around him.   I wondered why he was quiet.  I realized it this morning. I guess that I'm slow on the uptake.  There is nothing to say.  There is no pleasant past to discuss.  There are no enjoyable memories to re-share.  There were so many tears that I could fill a river.

While all that bullying was going on, I was building a career, a life, friendships and activities.  I am retiring to that life.   It's a life that we don't share.  I have grown and changed since that faithful day in July that truly changed my life.  I have moved forward.

There is nothing to say since we live in parallel worlds.  Saying, "no," to everything that I wanted to do didn't stop me from moving forward.  In his mind, he controlled me.  However, I just moved on.  

Thank you, Almighty!!!!

Today, I went to work.  I will read, walk, and get my hair colored.

I am also going out to dinner.

Thank you, Almighty for helping me to create a new me!!!!!

GRATEFUL FOR THE NEW ME

I am grateful to the Almighty because I really am THE NEW ME!!!!!!

I accomplished everything that I set out to do today.  I am proud of me.

Tonight, as I told you, I'm going to dinner with friends and then to the Sisterhood Book Club.

I spent a weekday with him.  He is so the same, but I am so changed that it is truly amazing.  There was very little conversation.   He is confused as to what to where to the retirement party.  I again told him in my smallest voice possible that the place was upscale and a shirt and tie would be the appropriate attire.  He has this, BUT, to create confrontation he showed me a sport shirt.  I offered him a choice........TO GO OR NOT.

Something tells me that I haven't heard the end of this.

I'm smiling as I write this.

I'm so changed and so happy.

Thank you, Almighty!!!!

GRATEFUL THAT I AM RETIRING!!!!

I am grateful to the Almighty because I am retiring.

I am grateful because the Almighty helped me to accomplish my goals.

I am retiring with the respect and admiration of everyone that I worked with.  I am having a retirement party!!!   I am actually taking days off from work which you know for me is amazing.

I have friends and activities to go to.  People are happy that I am coming on board.  I went to my yoga class last night and my teacher, Leslie explained how I could take unlimited classes.  Then I attended a Sisterhood meeting where an Israeli singer performed.  I was invited to join many other activities.   I was thrilled.

I called friends to tell them that I have retired.  I spoke to one in particular telling her, because she is a speech therapist, how I have gotten my very own life back.  I have learned to zip my mouth.  I have learned to "let it go" and "choose inner peace."

I can retire in safety.

Today, on my day off, I will turn my closet into Spring.  I will walk.  I will read.  In the evening, I will go out to dinner with my friends and attend a Sisterhood Book Discussion.

Thank you, Almighty for helping me to make my new life possible.

I am grateful!!!!!

GRATEFUL FOR HAPPINESS!!!!

I am grateful to the Almighty because I am finally happy and content with my decisions.

I am definitely going to retire.   Today I will hand in my letters and will mail my papers.  Yesterday I went to CO and discussed the insurance.   He is going to go to SS today to turn in my papers.  I will mail my papers to the state.   I will hand in my papers to the Principal and the Superintendent.   I am on my way!!!!

I was upset yesterday.   It was like a wave of emotions that hit me.  I have made it through the rain.  I am overripe to begin my new life.   But, like in a dream, I saw all the different parts of my life............   I cried and then I felt better.

It is now 10:30.  I have handed in my letters and made my retirement official.   I feel very happy and relieved.   He handed in my paperwork at Social Security for Medicare Part B. They will process it.   I will mail the retirement papers to the state later.  I'm on my way!!!!!

Later, I will walk outside.  I will finish my book.   I will go to my yoga class.

I am grateful to the Almighty because I am happy and content with my decisions.

GRATEFUL FOR MY SURVIVAL

I am grateful to the Almighty because I made it through the rain.

Today I am going to Central Office to speak to a woman about retirement insurance.  I will be getting a letter that says, " I RESIGN FOR THE PURPOSE OF RETIREMENT."

I am so excited.   An entire new life awaits me!!!!!   I have so many things that I enjoy.  I can't wait to begin!!!!!

I know how to handle him.   This morning, he drove me to work and will pick me up by the flagpole to go to CO.  He was the usual downer.   However, true to the new me, I was careful as I what I said to him.  I'm proud of me!!!!!

I am excited!!!!!

I am grateful to the Almighty because I made it through the rain!!!!

GRATEFUL FOR MOVIN' ON!!!!!

I am grateful to the Almighty for my new life.   I am movin' on!!!!!

Today I will make copies of the retirement paper work.  I will fill out the Medicare Part B papers because tomorrow I will bring them to Central Office.  I will be meeting with Sue Cohen at 3PM sharp.   This week I will mail the papers.  I will be movin' on!!!!

Today, I'm going to my yoga class.  As usual, I will go to Fresh Produce.  I will put gas in the truck and go to DD.  I will read the newspapers and my book.   I hope to walk for 2 hours.

I hope to go out to dinner tonight.

Thank you, Almighty for allowing me to approach this new phase of my life with confidence.

RETIREMENT, SYNAGOGUE AND YOGA

Thank you, Almighty for this beautiful Sabbath!!!!!!  I am grateful!!!!

Synagogue was awesome.   I told all of my friends that I would be retiring and they found me so many activities to do with them!!!!!

My Yoga Workshop was awesome!!!!  I learned about the history of the poses that we do.

I'm off to walk!!!!

The younger one is coming to have dinner and a movie with us.

Thank you, Almighty for my decision to retire, a beautiful synagogue service and yoga.

I am grateful!!!!

Later-   I was able to walk for two hours.  That was amazing.   The younger one never came and so I was able to have tuna and salad for dinner.    I was able to read.

I am grateful to the Almighty for this!!!!!

GRATEFUL BECAUSE I MADE IT THROUGH THE RAIN....................ENJOY!!!

I am grateful to the Almighty because I have made it through the rain.

As is my custom, on Fridays, before the Sabbath, I look back on my week to evaluate it.

This week has been amazing.   I DECIDED TO RETIRE THIS WEEK.  The retirement planner came on Tuesday night and I crunched the numbers with the intention of retiring in June.  I made an appointment to go to Central Office on Monday to look at the health insurance. I told the administrators that I was thinking of retiring.  I know when to mail in the papers and give in the resignation letters.  This weekend I am signing forms and notorizing them.  I am packing up my office and taking things home with me.  WOW!!!! It's been an amazing week.  No wonder my shoulder hurts despite all the yoga that I am doing.

I also took off Wednesday to attend the yoga book club. I went to Restorative Yoga.  I read.  I touched base with friends through phone calls and texting.   I ha dinner with a friend last night who is also retiring.

I was suffering from being nostalgic about my career.   Then I thought of yoga.  My aim now is to celebrate my successes. I will live and enjoy the moment.

The Almighty must have had a plan for me.  Four years ago, when the issues began with him, I could not have predicted that I would be in this wonderful position.  However, it has been a journey of discovery and change.  I am not the same person that I was. I know how to handle him.  I don't have to hide at work any longer.  I AM FREE TO BE ME!!!!! 

With all that has happened to me, with the Almighty's help, I made it through the rain.

I intend to enjoy from this moment on.......

Thank you, Almighty for being there for me!!!!!

GRATEFUL FOR MY LIFE

I am so grateful to the Almighty for my life.

As I sit in my office,  I realize how the Almighty has taken care of me.  

It is said that everything happens for a reason and I really believe that.   The Almighty has watched over me since I was a child and has always guided me with His love.

He wanted me to retire years ago.    However, He felt that I needed a life in place before I left work.  He created that life for me.

My new life will include walking, book clubs, the synagogue and yoga.

I am excited beyond belief.

Thank you, Almighty for watching over me.

Tonight, I plan to have dinner with my friend who is also retiring.   It is something that I am looking forward to.

GRATEFUL................YET NERVOUS!!!!!

I am grateful to the Almighty because I will be retiring this coming June.  That is next month.  On the other hand, I am nervous and a bit nostalgic.

I took the day off yesterday and had a wonderful time.  I went to my Yoga Book Club and they were delighted that I had made this decision.

I walked.  I read.  I relaxed.

Hank Sessa, the retirement gentleman came over last night and we re-crunched the numbers.

Martin and I went to dinner.   I did not attend the Sisterhood Fashion Show because Hank left too late and it was pouring.

I can do this!!!   It's time!!!!   I can deal with him!!!!!

I'm going to do this!!!

I'm delighted!!!

I can't wait!!!

I'm afraid.

Does this make sense??????

I am grateful to the Almighty because I will retire this year, but I am nervous!!!!