GRATEFUL FOR REVELATIONS

I am grateful to the Almighty for the revelation that I had in the middle of the night.  IT IS GOING TO CHANGE MY LIFE!!!!!!

I gave myself something to soar about yesterday when I had my hair colored and blown out.  I celebrated politically, as I told you, by taking him out to dinner.   At dinner, he proceeded to tell me how sick he is.  He has no appetite.  He is tired. He can't sleep at night. I should tell you that he has the common cold.  I should tell you that he naps during the day and does nothing to make himself better.  He complains that he can't sleep at night.  If you nap during the day, you can't sleep at night. I should tell you that he ate his entire burger.  This week his appetite included many muffins and pasta for dinner.    And on and on......................

I realized that this conversation is the only thing that he has control of. He would love to give me anxiety.   I listened and commented appropriately.   I went home to watch the Olympics without telling him.  I enjoyed it.  I have gained weight from munching what I shouldn't but will loose it when the weather changes.  I am enjoying my life.

In the middle of the night, I awoke with a revelation that is very amazing.   IT WILL CHANGE MY LIFE.    I REALIZED THAT MY DREAMS HAVE COME TRUE!!!!    I ALSO REALIZED THAT I WAS GUILTY OF ADOLESCENT DREAMS!!!!! 

I based marriage, not on my parents who were dysfunctional to say the least, but on films that I saw especially those with GEORGE HAMILTON.   At least, I experienced marriage, and now I can move on.   I based children on having my own children, not involving artificial insemination. At least I experienced children.   Both these experiences were not based on reality. Both were failures.  Both were based upon ADOLESCENT DREAMS.

My dreams of a wonderful career was my own, created by me.  It was successful because it was benchmarked in reality and it is mine.

I am grateful to the Almighty that I had this revelation, especially before Shabbos.

I am also grateful to the Almighty because I was able to drive myself to work TODAY!!  Remember, I'm a yogi and I live in the moment!!!!!