GRATEFUL FOR A NEW LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty for my new life in this new decade.  It's going to be 2020!!!

I am grateful that I survived, with the Almighty's help, all of the abuse that I was subjected to.

I am going to try the best that I can to understand and to love myself and to keep myself healthy.

Thank you Almighty for this new beginning.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR MY STRENGTH

I am grateful to the Almighty for the strength that He has given to me.

Today I go back to the doctor to discuss my blood work.

I hope that everything is fine.

More later.........................

My checkup was wonderful.  Dr. Vezza advised me yo knock down some of the desserts that I've been eating which is fine and to go back to walking which is also fine.  This was the first tie that I went to the doctor by myself and I was proud of me!!!!!

I also got to finish my chores......

Matzah went to the vet and he has to return on January 27th for a re-check.

I am grateful to the Almighty for always walking by my side.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR A NEW DAY

I am grateful to the Almighty for a new day.

I did not practice yoga this morning.  I slept late.

I'm learning how to just "BE."

I don't have to race out of the house all the time.

It's a new feeing.

I am grateful to the Almighty for this.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR LETTING GO

I am grateful to the Almighty because I am happy.

Life is peaceful.

Life is calm.

Life is fun!!!

A new decade is almost here.

I am ready with the Almighty's help.

Thank you!!!

GRATEFUL FOR LETTING GO OF THIS DECADE

I am grateful to the Almighty because I practiced yoga in Leslie's class yesterday and she spoke about LETTING GO OF THE DECADE!!

That so resonated with me and I'm going to do it!!

I look forward to my future.

Today I received beautiful birthday notes from Doris, Rose and a lovely card from Karen and a visit and card from Rhonnie.  Chocolates came from Dana and Seth.  A FaceTime call came from Remi!!

It's a new life for me.

Thank you Almighty for always walking by my side.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR THE STRENGTH IN MYSELF

I am grateful to the Almighty for helping me to find the strength that is in me.

I am learning who I am and becoming a very peaceful and calm person.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR LEARNING TO TRUST MYSELF

I am grateful to the Almighty because even though I was tired, I practiced yoga in Leslies Christmas Class yesterday.

She spoke of trusting yourself and suddenly a light bulb went off in my head.  I was constantly criticized growing up.  I was never complimented but compared to Ellen when I was married to the creature and came up short.  This NEVER happened at work.

It is time to bring the two parts of me together and to learn to trust myself and believe in my decisions.

Today I'm getting my hair colored and blown out.

I'm going to take myself out for dinner.

I'm proud of me.

Thank you, Almighty, for always walking by my side.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL BECAUSE I AM HOME

I am grateful to the Almighty because I practiced yoga in Elyse's class yesterday and she used the term I AM HOME.

OMG!!  How that resonated with me!!!  I will come back to my home!  What a wonderful thought!!!!

She also spoke about the LIFE FORCE and PRANA in each of us.  It was an OMG! moment.

This morning I'm up early because there is only one yoga class at my studio today.  It's the Christmas class and it starts at 9AM.

I will be picking up DD coffee to finish breakfast with and then read The NY Times, the only paper that arrived.

I hope to finish my book today after I clean the house.

I am grateful to the Almighty that I AM HOME.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR UNDERSTANDING BALANCE

I am grateful to the Almighty because I practiced yoga yesterday in Leslie's class and she talked about balance.

I was especially interested when she said that there are always times in life when you are out of balance.  It is at those times that we need to recognize it and move forward knowing that a person can't be balanced every day.

Today I will practice yoga in Elyse's class.

I will have lunch with my friend Doris.

Thank you Almighty for always walking by my side.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR HAPPINESS IN MY LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty for the peace, calm and happiness in my life.

I am especially grateful to the Almighty because I practiced yoga in Doreen's class yesterday and she said something very profound and memorable.

HAPPINESS RELIES ON WHAT YOU ARE THINKING!!!!

Mornings can be difficult for me because of negative memories.  However I now have a wonderful mantra.

Today I will practice yoga and do some chores.

Matzah has to be at the vet for a recheck of his rash.

I am using my mantra diligently.

Thank you Almighty for this.

I am grateful.


Later:   Matzah's appointment was re-scheduled to Monday December 30th at 3:00 as the veterinarian was ill.

              I also received a phone call from Dr. Vezza letting me know that the blood work is in and he would like to discuss it on Monday December 30th at 12:00.  I looked back at the old paperwork and nothing seems to have changed.  I hope that remains so.

GRATEFUL FOR A NEW DAY

I am grateful to the Almighty for this beautiful new day.

Yesterday I had many side effects from the Shingles Shot but today I am feeling much better.

There is yoga to practice in Doreen's class.

There are chores to be done.

There is a book and newspapers to read.

I made a lunch date with Doris for Tuesday.

I am grateful to the Almighty for the peace and quiet in my life.

May it always be so.

I sat and read in The Yoga Room this evening.  It was wonderful!!!

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL BECAUSE I AM HERE

I am grateful to the Almighty because I am here enjoying my life in the moment.

I try very hard to pull myself out of the past and into the present.  Sometimes like yesterday, that can be very tough but I keep plugging along.  I am proud of me!!!

I did not go to services today.  There are more side effects to the Shingles shot than I thought possible.

Today will be an R&R day.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful that I am here and free to rest in my own home.

GRATEFUL FOR LIVING IN THE PRESENT

I am grateful to the Almighty because He has taught me to live in the present.

When I catch myself in the past.......I come right back.

Yesterday I had a wonderful meeting with Dom and then went out to eat with Gail, Rhonnie and Linda.

Today I will practice yoga because my arm feels a lot better and have my hair blown out for the Sabbath.

Thank you Almighty for always walking by my side.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR LEARNING TO BELIEVE IN MYSELF

I am grateful to the Almighty because He is teaching me to believe in myself.  Because of the way I was brought up (the mother that I had) and the creature that I had the misfortune to marry, that doesn't always happen......

Today I slept late and did not go to practice yoga.  I took the Shingles Shot yesterday and my poor little arm is in serious pain!!!!!  We didn't get to play MahJongg yesterday.  We went to dinner in the squall and we having such a good time we didn't want to leave.

Today I'm meeting with Dom and have an appointment with Kyra.  Tonight I will have dinner with Linda, Gail and Rhonda.

I will read and relax too.

I believe in my.

Thanks to the Almighty I'm very proud of me.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR THE SPACE INSIDE ME

I am grateful to the Almighty because He has allowed me to practice yoga.

In yesterday's class the instructor mentioned that we can adapt poses so that we don't sacrifice our own bodies.  She also made reference to the fact that we should not sacrifice ourselves in any relationship.  That so resonated in me.  I am so trying NEVER to do that again.

She spoke of life being difficult and how we must cultivate space within ourselves.  To do this we must BREATHE, BE CALM and PEACEFUL whenever we can.  Yoga is a wonderful place to practice this.

Today I will practice yoga in Margaret's class. 

I will speak with Judith.

I have to go to The Home Depot to make keys.  Strangely my kitchen door key has disappeared.

I'm also going to get the Shingles shot.

Tonight I'm having dinner with Barbara, Gail and Debbie.  Then we are going to play Mah Jong at my house.

I do my chores and try very hard to find space for me.

I am grateful to the Almighty for learning this.

Thank you!!

GRATEFUL FOR HAVING THE WORDS TO SEE REALITY

I am grateful to the Almighty because I practiced yoga in Leslie's class and she spoke of being based in the present.....to view things in the present.......to have vision in the present and to be able to see reality and not dreams.

It put into words what I had been doing but am trying not to do anymore!!

Last night's last class at The Jewish Institute was awesome.  There was a violin concert afterwards which was beautiful. 

I ate cookies too!!!!

Today I will practice yoga in Elyse's class.

I have a dental appointment today.

I also have a Sisterhood Executive Board Meeting tonight.

Thank you Almighty for my new life.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR THE JOY OF LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty because I smile at the sunrise and see the joy of living.

I'm going for my blood/urine test this morning.  I know that the Almighty will walk beside me as I do this.

I hope to practice yoga in Leslie's class.

I shall come home to clean the house.

Hopefully, it won't snow so I can attend the last class in The Adult Institute.

I am grateful to the Almighty for the joy in my life.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR LEARNING ABOUT THE POWER IN ME

I am grateful to the Almighty because I understand that I have the power inside me to be calm and quiet.  I live in the Present......not in the Past or Future.

I had a wonderful quiet day in my home yesterday.  After services there was no need to run out of the house to go anywhere.  I was quiet and content.  I read my Lisa See book and finished it.  I organized my yoga books.  I was content.

Today I will practice yoga in Doreen's class.

I will also be doing  variety of errands.......Fairway, Citibank, Plainview Library, Harmon's and gassing up the truck.

I came home to read the newspapers with Dunkin' Donuts coffee. I need to complete the stories for tomorrow's Adult Institute.  It's the last class!!!   I will also fill out Christmas cards for Nick and Louis and start my next book.

I have learned that I am in charge of me.  I don't have to be difficult with myself or judge myself.  I can just be.

Thank you Almighty for the new stillness inside me.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR THE PEACE AND QUIET IN MY SABBATH

I am grateful to the Almighty because I am slowly beginning to understand myself.

I will attend services this morning.

I will meditate and read in the afternoon.

I am grateful to the Almighty for always walking by my side.

Thank you.

Update:   I had a wonderful Sabbath.  Services were enjoyable and my friends and I were the last ones to leave the Kiddush.  I came home to call Karen.  I read both Newsday and The New York Times.  I re-organized my yoga books and finished read Lisa See's The Island of Sea Women.  After dinner I started a new book.

I am grateful to the Almighty for the peace and quiet in my Sabbath.

Thank you Almighty.

GRATEFUL FOR TAKING CARE OF MY NEEDS

I am grateful to the Almighty because He sent me to yoga and it was there that I listened to yogic philosophy and learned to take care of my needs.

This week I practiced yoga in 8 classes because I needed to feel calm.

Today I am actually going for my annual physical.  I hope and pray that the Almighty will walk by my side and my checkup will be fine.

Thank you.

Update:

I drove to the doctor and sat in the waiting room where the creature and I sat.  That was tough. I spoke with Dr. Vezza at length and he was quite gracious.  He too felt that the creature was strange and he shuddered.  Then we did my checkup.  My pressure is fine (118/74)  and on Monday I'm going for blood work.  

Thank you Almighty for taking care of me.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR THE CONNECTIONS IN MY LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty because although it snowed yesterday in the morning, it melted and I was able to practice yoga in Leslie's evening class.

It was there that I learned to be grateful for the many connections in my life.  To make this point hit home, my hot water unit went off and within 5 minutes Freddy was there fixing it!!!

I am grateful to the Almighty for the connections in my life.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL BECAUSE I NOTICE HOW I FEEL

I am grateful to the Almighty because he sent me to practice yoga in Elyse's class yesterday and it was there that  I learned  to notice how I feel.  To me this means that I care about my self first!!!

Yesterday was a wonderful day.  I went to Trader Joe's and then met the ladies for lunch.  I bought socks in Incredible Feet and ordered a North Face jacket with my friend Rose.

I came home to read.  Then it was off to Absolute Yoga again to practice yoga in Dawn's class and eat out at Pasteria.

Today I'm not going anywhere EXCEPT to Judith!!!!   It's snowing!!!

I will practice yoga in my YOGA ROOM and make chicken balls and zucchini pasta for dinner.

I am grateful to the Almighty for learning about myself.

Thank you!!!

GRATEFUL THAT I AM IN GOOD HEALTH

I am grateful to the Almighty because the Almighty had me  practice yoga in Leslie's class yesterday and she spoke of gratitude for good health.

Thanks to the Almighty my physical health (Body)  is good thanks to diet and exercise.  I will go to Dr. Vezza on Friday for the beginning of my annual checkup.  With the help of the Almighty I will be fine.

I need to work on my emotional health (Mind).  I must continue to remember to stay in the present moment and let go of that which doesn't serve me.  I have the Power to do this and I will continue to monitor myself.

Today I'm going to practice yoga and have lunch with my girlfriends.  Last night's session at The Adult Institute was wonderful.  I enjoyed going with Gail and Rhonnie.

I'm also going to do some chores today.  Snow tomorrow!!!!!

Thank you Almighty fr keeping me in good health both physically and emotionally.  

I am grateful!

GRATEFUL THAT I HAVE POWER

I am grateful to the Almighty because He sent me to practice  yoga yesterday.  It was in Doreen's class that I learned that I have the power to take care of my needs and wants.......the power to be calm.....the power to control my life.

I canceled going to see Remi tomorrow.  I have the power to do that and it's a awful lot of money to go there.  Unappreciated I might add.....  I have felt this way since I saw Shula's crib and the way that my daughter speaks with her as though she was the mother.  This hasn't changed.  She was always looking for a mother that she could look down on.

Today I will practice yoga.  It's a rainy day.....a good day to clean house too!!

I have The Adult Institute tonight.  The stories were quite good.

Thank you Almighty for helping me to see that I have power.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR FREEDOM

I am grateful to the Almighty because I am finally free....free to be me.....free from abuse....free to have fun!!!

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR MY HOME

I am grateful to the Almighty for allowing me to make my house......my home.

I actually slept until 9:30 this morning because I was tired and I could stay in my home unlike past years.  I will pray at home.

Today I will read, relax and probably meditate. 

Thank you Almighty because my house is now my home!!!

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR THE LIGHT INSIDE ME

I am grateful to the Almighty because I practiced yoga yesterday and it was in Hollie's class that she spoke of each of us having a light inside ourselves to protect us from cloudy days.

This resonated with me especially when she said that THIS TOO SHALL PASS.  With all the grief that I have had with this latest trigger, old though it may be, I could feel the trigger fading.....

I had a wonderful time with Karen yesterday.  As a birthday gift, she treated me to a High Tea and tour of the Phipps House at Westbury Gardens.  How beautiful it was!!!!  I was so touched by this gift.

Today I will practice yoga and have my hair blown out.  Incredible Feet has promised that my UGG boots will be ready.  I would like to take my rings into Marc Solomon to have them changed.

Thank you Almighty for helping me to keep my light shining.  Sometimes that can be so hard.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL ABOUT THE PEACE AND CALM WITHIN ME

I am grateful to the Almighty because I practiced yoga in Margaret's class today and she spoke of the peace and quiet in each one of us that we can draw upon at any time we need it.

I really needed to hear that today because today I realized that it was Martin sending Leslie those crazy e-mails.  While I was trying to keep him alive and healthy, he was bent on destroying me.  I actually cried at the studio and have thought about this all day.  Isn't it enough that I have biological daughters that feel he walked on water and that Dana is actually naming her child after him??  Thank goodness for yoga because I will ride this out!!!

The Sisterhood Book Club was lots of fun last night.  We went to Taby's and I was very supported by my friends.

Today I will practice yoga and order books for the next two Sisterhood Book Club meetings.

My friend Karen is coming over and we are going to Westbury Gardens for tea and to see the house.  It should be fun.

I know that there is peace and calm within me.  I am grateful to the Almighty for this. Sometimes it's just hard to reach because I am feeling bombarded.

Thank you Almighty for being there for me.  You're going to have to work extra hard today!!

GRATEFUL FOR LEARNING TO TAKE CARE OF MY NEEDS

I am grateful to the Almighty because He sent me to yoga and it was there that I learned about taking care of my needs.

Last night I practiced yoga in Dawn's class.  I didn't practice in the morning because of the snow.  I came home to finish my book.

Today I will again practice yoga.

I will have the oil changed in the car and go to Staples to spread items.

Tonight I will be having dinner at Taby's in Norwich with Sisterhood friends before the book club.

I am grateful to the Almighty for taking care of me and teaching me how to take care of what I need.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR INNER PEACE

I am so grateful to the Almighty because of the inner peace that I feel.

Yesterday was a prime example.  There is a snow storm coming and so after I practiced yoga I went to Fairway and loaded up on groceries.  I came home to clean the entire house and then have dinner.  I called friends.  In the evening I read and watched The Good Doctor.  I have never felt so peaceful and I am grateful to the Almighty for this.

Today I did not practice yoga in the studio.  We got an awful lot of snow so I went out and shoveled it.  It was fun!!!  I feel safe and comfortable in my own home and I'm grateful.  I will do some chores inside today.  I have therapy later and just maybe I'll take an evening yoga class.

I am grateful to the Almighty for the inner peace that I have.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR PEACE IN MY LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty for the peace that I have in my life.

Yesterday was a case in point.  I awoke to a day where there would be rain, sleet and snow.  I was able to practice yoga at 9AM in Doreen's class.  I had a plan.  I went Citibank and then to pick up medication.  I went to Trader Joe's and put gas in the truck.  From there I was weighed at WW and I proceeded to the butcher and to pick up a chopped salad at Pasteria.  I returned to do a wash and pay bills. The chicken dinner that I made was delicious and I watched television and had wine while I ate.  All within the calm and quiet of my home.

Today I again woke up peacefully.  I gave Matzah Reiki and brushed him too.  Today it plans to snow again in the later afternoon.  If so I won't attend The Jewish Institute.  However today I will practice yoga and do some chores too.

My home gets its weekly cleaning today too.

I am grateful to the Almighty for the peace and quiet in my life.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR A NEW DAY

I am grateful to the Almighty for a new day.

I am healthy.

I am happy.

I am grateful to the Almighty for this new day!!

GRATEFUL THAT THERE IS BALANCE IN MY LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty because it was He who sent me to practice yoga and it was there that I learned through the poses to balance my life.

I am grateful because in learning to balance my life, I have let go of that which doesn't serve me so that I can heal.

Today I will attend services at PJC.  I will read and walk at The Home Depot.  I will also meditate at Plainview Meditation.

I am grateful to the Almighty for the balance that my life has.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR THE BREATHE

I am grateful to the Almighty every day of my life for the breathe that is in me that allows me to enjoy each and every moment of my life.

I pray that I will be in good health for many years to come.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR A WONDERFUL WORLD

I am grateful to the Almighty because on this Thanksgiving Day I can really appreciate the wonderful world that He gave me.

I am healthy.  

I am happy.

I am the matriarch of a wonderful little family soon to have an addition.

Today I will be going to Shula and Ellie for the holiday.  Izzy and Hilary are picking me up.  

I'm practicing yoga in the GRATITUDE CLASS........

More later.................

My Gratitude Class was absolutely wonderful as was my Thanksgiving.

I have learned so much this passed year from the Almighty.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR THE OM IN HOME

I am grateful to the Almighty because He has made me healthy and happy so that I can practice yoga.

I learn so much there.

Yesterday things were put in perspective as Elyse explained that the OM is in home.  For years I never even considered the house that I lived in to be my home.  Thanks to the Almighty I do and I had tears in my eyes when I heard this.

Today I will again practice yoga.  I hope to meditate and have Louis blow out my hair for the holiday.

I will read, relax and BE in MY HOME.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR MY NEW LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty for the wonderful new life that I have.

The way PTSD works is that I'm sad in the morning.  It isn't depression but it comes as a result of what was done to me.  As the morning progresses it lifts and I am grateful for my life and grateful that those who abused me are gone.

Today I will practice yoga.

I believe that I will be able to take a walk this afternoon as the weather is beautiful 

I also have to buy a dessert for Thanksgiving.

Then it's home to read.

Thank you Almighty for my new life.

I am grateful.

GRATEUL FOR A NEW DAY

I am grateful to the Almighty because I am healthy and there is a beautiful new day ahead of me.

Yesterday I did so many fun things.  I practiced yoga.  I went shopping at Trader Joe's.  I took Matzah in for a grooming and I got a manicure.  I made stir-fry tofu for dinner.

Today I will practice yoga and then clean the house.  I'm looking forward to stir fried tofu again.    

I have to call Dr. Vezza to make a checkup appointment.

I will attend my class at The Jewish Institute.

Thank you Almighty for a beautiful new day.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR MY LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty for my entire life.

I know that friends say that I had a tough life but it was the toughness that made me the person that I am today.

The Almighty walked by my side always.  I succeeded at school.  I absolutely defined myself by my career even today.  I asked the Almighty for daughters.  I wanted a grandson and then a granddaughter.  I wanted a split level house in the suburbs.  I wanted to travel in the United States.  I wanted to own property on the East End and experience that.  I wanted to participate in a Jewish center and community.  I did that. 

Most of all I wanted to be healthy and happy.  The Almighty provided that also.

I believe that the Almighty tested me like Job in the belly of the whale.

I never gave up hope.

I may have questioned why but the Almighty was always in my heart.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR INTENTIONS

I am grateful to the Almighty because He sent me to a wonderful meditation workshop dealing with how to love yourself and I learned so much.

I do love myself.  I'm very proud of me and all that I have accomplished.

I am so happy that I create an intention for myself each morning and I work on it.

I am grateful to the Almighty for walking by my side all of my life.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR SAVORING THE MOMENT

I am grateful to the Almighty because He sent m to practice yoga and I have learned so much.

I have learned to create space in my mind by letting go of that which doesn't serve me.

I have learned to appreciate the moment.

Yesterday I learned to savor the moment.

I am grateful to the Almighty for this.

Today I will again practice yoga and then prepare for Shabbos.

I am grateful to the Almighty for teaching me to savor the moment.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR ALL MY CONNECTIONS

I am grateful to the Almighty for all the connections in my life.

My friends cared about me and that helped me to survive the most horrific time in my life.

Now I'm able to plan activities and really enjoy life.

Today I will practice yoga in two classes.

My hair will be colored and blown out.

Tonight I'm having dinner with my friend Margie.

Life is wonderful.

I am so grateful to the Almighty for this.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR LEARNING TO APPRECIATE MY LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty because He has seen fit to give me an amazing life and I am so grateful for this.

Everyday I appreciate my life.  That gives me space in my mind to see the joys and not the sorrows.

Today is a wonderful day.  I will practice yoga in Margaret's class as well as in The Yoga Book Club.  I have two therapy appointments today.....with both Judith and Kyra.  This evening is Torah Fund at Joyce's house.

Busy! Busy!  But oh what fun.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR SPACE

I am grateful that I practiced yoga yesterday because the instructor spoke about yoga giving us space.

What exactly does that mean??  It means that one has to LET GO OF THAT WHICH DOESN'T SERVE YOU to have room for life.

I tried it this morning and it worked!!!  It will take time but I will make it part of me.

This morning I will practice yoga. I hope to pick up my ring too.  Then I'm meeting the girls for our Tuesday lunch and then we are all going to book club at the library.

Tonight I have a Sisterhood Executive Board Meeting.

Life is good.  I have space.

Thank you Almighty for this.

I am grateful!!

GRATEFUL FOR BEING RETIRED

I am grateful to the Almighty because I am retired and can finally appreciate what that means.

Today I will practice yoga.

There are newspapers to read and friends to call.

I have errands to do.

I have a home to clean.

Tonight I will be taking my course at The Jewish Adult Institute.  I will be speaking to the Rabbi after class about the baby's Hebrew name.

All this is done peacefully and with a smile.

I am grateful to the Almighty for this.

Thank you!!!

GRATEFUL FOR A QUIET DAY STAYING HOME

I am grateful to the Almighty because yesterday was the Sabbath and I had a quiet day staying home.

It was the creature's day of birth and I wanted to see if I could stay home.  I did and enjoyed every moment of it from sleeping late to drinking coffee slowly while reading my two newspapers to saying my prayers. I did however go to meditate.  It was a beautiful and spiritual day.

Today I'm visiting Dana and Seth.......I'm leaving at 9:45!!!

I had a wonderful visit with Seth and Dana.  They both make me feel at home an really care about me.  We talked, laughed and gave each other little gifts.  I ordered Japanese food for lunch.   Going home, I dropped Dana off at her doctor......and then went home.

I went to Pasteria for dinner. 

I'm really happy and grateful to the Almighty for this.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR THE SABBATH

I am grateful to the Almighty because today is the Sabbath and I was exhausted and so i slept late and am not attending services.

I will say my prayers at home because I can!!!!

Last night I spoke to Sari about the baby's birth and the wedding.

I said my prayers and ate dinner happily.

Today I will read and relax.

Later in the day I will walk at The Home Depot and meditate.

Thank you Almighty for my life.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR THE ULTIMATE FREEDOM

I am grateful to the Almighty because He has sent me to yoga and it is there that I learn the words to understand how my life has changed.

Last night I chose to take an evening class along with my daytime class because I could. Leslie's theme this week because Veteran's Day was Monday was freedom.  She spoke of the ultimate freedom meaning being able to express yourself.  That is what I NEVER could do growing up as I was always mocked.  I couldn't do it in marriage because I needed to be safe and there could be repercussions.  Even by being quiet the creature abused anyone that I was close to.

Now I have the ultimate freedom.  I can express myself without the wrath of my abusers.

Ironically today I will not be practicing yoga as I will be going to a breakfast of the F.R.E.E group.

My friend Karen is meeting me at home and we are going together.  Later I have a meeting with Doreen and Nanette and Blayne to discuss the breakfast we are planning for long term members of PJC.   Tonight Sari and I will discuss Dana and Seth's wedding.

I have ultimate freedom to do this.  I am living the life I want.  I feel balanced.  I feel happy.

Thank you Almighty for this ultimate freedom.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR A FIRE IN MY BELLY

I am grateful to the Almighty because I practiced yoga yesterday and the instructor spoke about having a fire in your belly.

To me this meant that you must always be strong and resilient.

I am grateful to the Almighty because He made me strong and most of my dreams did come true!!! 

Today I will practice yoga in two classes!!!!  I will have my hair blown out and go food shopping.

Tonight I'm having dinner with friends and going to Yoga Nidra.

I am grateful to the Almighty for my life.

Thank you!!!!

GRATEFUL FOR A NEW DAY

I am grateful to the Almighty for this beautiful new day.

I am healthy.

I am happy.

I can breathe in my own home calmly and peacefully.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR FREEDOM

I am grateful to the Almighty for the freedom in my life.

Yesterday was Veteran's Day and I practiced yoga in two classes.  Leslie spoke of the gift of freedom in our lives and related it to the veteran's.

I now am free.  However I am human and it bothered me that I married a creature and that I could not change that creature and it had to die for me to be free.  I tried so hard to get it to understand how to be human BUT it never could or would.   I did the same thing with my mother and nothing helped.  They were wired incorrectly.

Last night I attended m class at the Jewish Institute.  We had read Yani on the Mountain and the discussion was quite good.

Today is our last Art Tour of the Fall season.  We are going to MOMA.   I will discuss the trip later....................

I had a wonderful time.  I am grateful to the Almighty for all that He does for me.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR CALMNESS IN MY HOME

I am grateful to the Almighty for the calm feeling that I have in my home.

It is clean and warm and oh so silent.

There is nothing to fear........no strategies to create.

I don't have to run out on a cold morning.

Matzah feels the calm also as we hug!!

Today I will practice yoga in 2 classes.  I will be discussing the first story, YANI ON THE MOUNTAIN in my course at the Jewish Institute tonight.

I am grateful to the Almighty for all that I have.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR MY LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty for the life that He has given me.

I feel calm and happy.

Today I will practice yoga.  I will be going to Trader Joe's.  I need to put gas in the truck too and get the truck washed. My plan is to head down to Weight Watchers to put that back in place in my life. I also intent to purchase coffee at Dunkin' Donuts like I used to. There are  books and newspapers to read as well as the short story to finish for tomorrows class. All of this will be done in the peace and quiet of my home.

I am grateful to the Almighty for this life.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR THE CHANGES IN MY LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty because I practiced yoga in Leslie's class yesterday and she spoke of the positive aspects of change.

I must admit that I am grateful to the Almighty because within all of my psychological abuse I was resilient and able to adapt and make positive changes in my life.

I am now reaping the benefit of all those changes.

I enjoy each day to the fullest and am grateful for having that day.  

Yesterday after I practiced yoga, Nick re-did my hair so the it was purple to his liking.  I love it. I shopped at Fairway and had Renee at Solomons clean my jewelry and put on me the butterfly I had bought for the holidays.  I went home to prepare for Shabbos.

Now I'm getting ready for services.  This afternoon I hope to read the story for Rabbi Conn's class in Israeli short stories.  I will walk at The Home Depot and Meditate.

I love that the creature isn't here to spoil my health and happiness.

Thank you Almighty for all that you have done for me.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR FRIENDS

I am grateful to the almighty because He has given me the ability to make friends easily.

Yesterday was a case in point.  I really needed to get to the DMV to get my enhanced license.  Karen is having issues with her daughter and couldn't go.  I called my financial advisor and friend Dom and we went and got it and it's done.

I was able to clean the entire house.  Then I practiced yoga at an evening class that I had never gone to.  I took myself out for dinner and ate cookies!!!  There goes my A1C  but I can always improve!!!!!

Today I will practice yoga and then get my hair re-purpled and then blown out.

Tonight is the Sabbath.........a moment that I truly enjoy.

I am grateful to the Almighty for the life that He has given me.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR MY STRENGTH

I am grateful to the Almighty for the strength that He has given me.

I am grateful to the Almighty for my smile........and my laugh........and my new life.

Today my friend Dom and I are going to the DMV to get me an enhanced drivers license.

I am grateful to the Almighty for all that I have, all that I am and can be.

Thank you.



P.S.   I now have an enhanced drivers license.   I came how to clean the entire house.  I'm going to practice yoga in a new class tonight and take myself out for dinner.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR LEARNING TO BE BALANCED

I am grateful to the Almighty because He sent me to yoga and in yesterday's class the instructor spoke of maintaining balance.

This was something that I never had my entire life as my days was filled with my safety and strategies to keep me alive and safe.

Yesterday I visited my grandson Remi.  It is so wonderful visiting without the creature.  I can be me and everyone is relaxed!!!!

Today I will practice yoga.

I have an appointment with Judith.

I have to organize the material that I'm bringing to the DMV because I'm going with Dom tomorrow!!

I have begun to take my blood pressure for my annual checkup in December.

Tonight I'm going to Greek Express with friends and then to a mini-course given by Rabbi Conn on tattoos.

Thank you Almighty for my new and wonderful life.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR LEARNING TO LET IT GO!!!

I am grateful to the Almighty for teaching me to practice yoga because it was there that I learned that I must let go of that which doesn't serve me so that I can heal.

It's tough to do BUT most of my memories aren't real.  They are fantasies that I created and I must remember that.............it's tough when I'm confronted with the facts.  Then I have to split my life in half and remember how successful I am.  It's a processed I don't have a lot of patience.

Today I will be practicing yoga. 

 It's Election Day and I will be voting.  

I'm going to visit Remi.

I called Dom and made arrangements to go to the DMV with him on Thursday.

I am grateful to the Almighty for the joy in my life.

I will continue to rid myself of that which doesn't serve me so I can heal.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR JOYFUL DAYS

I am grateful to the Almighty for all the joy in my life.

Yesterday Meditation and Movement Workshop was just awesome.  I really had fun.  Dinner with my friend Marilyn was also fun.

Dana and Seth were married in Prospect Park yesterday!!!!!

Today I'm practicing yoga.

 I'm having lunch at a new Mexican place with my friend Estelle.  Chores will follow this. Tonight my friend Gail is picking me up as we are attending classes at the Adult Institute.

Life is so good.

I am grateful to the Almighty for the joys in my life.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR MY NEW LIFE

I am beyond grateful to the Almighty for the new life that I have.

Yesterday I attended services and kiddish.  I read the papers and my book.  I walked at The Home Depot.  I had a delicious dinner.   I am beyond happy to the Almighty for all that He has given me.

This morning I will again practice yoga.  Later it's off to get a manicure/pedicure.  This evening I have a Meditation Workshop with my friend Marilyn.  We are going to dinner too!!

I am grateful to the Almighty for my new life.

Thank you!!

GRATEFUL FOR LEARNING TO LISTEN TO MY NEEDS

I am grateful to the Almighty because He has taught me to listen to exactly what I need.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR THE SABBATH

I am grateful to the Almighty because today is Friday.......the beginning of the Sabbath.

I approach this day with such calm and peace.......it is so beautiful.

Today I will practice yoga and Louis will blow out my hair.  Nick has been trying to get my hair to be more purple.....  Then it's off to Solomons to approve a new design for my engagement ring......

I'm making chicken  for dinner.

Thank you Almighty for my healthy, happy and calm life.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR BEING ABLE TO BREATHE DEEPLY

I am grateful to the Almighty because I am able to breathe deeply in my own home.

Today I will practice yoga in two classes.

I will clean house because it's a rainy day.

It's Halloween and I will enjoy giving out candy!!!

I will read too!!!

I am grateful for the calm that I feel in my house on this rainy day.

I am able to breathe deeply.

I thank the Almighty for this feeling.

May it always be so.

GRATEFUL FOR HEALING AND GROWING

I am grateful to the Almighty because He sent me to practice yoga last night and it was there that Dawn spoke about healing and growing.

Slowly.....I am healing and growing into the person that I always was but wasn't allowed to show because I was psychologically abused.   

Yesterday was wonderful.  I loved the Guggenheim Museum and being with my friends.  We came back home and I ate a small dinner and went to practice yoga.  I came home to go to a Sisterhood Board meeting!!!!!  Wow!!!

Today Matzah is going for his checkup and I have therapy.

I will walk at The Home Depot because the weather is bad.  I will be able to go on my errands with Matzah in tow.

Tonight I'm going out to dinner with Mahjong friends and then paying Mahjong!!!

Life is good.

Thank you Almighty!!

I am grateful!!

GRATEFUL FOR LEARNING TO BE KIND TO MYSELF

I am grateful to the Almighty because He sent me to learn to practice yoga and it was there that I learned to be kind to myself.

Yesterday was an amazing and wonderful day.  I practiced yoga.  I did my food shopping. I met with Rabbi Conn and planned Dana and Seth's wedding.  Then I called my friends to invite them to the wedding.

Today I will go on the fourth of the Art Tours.......to the Guggenheim Museum to see an exhibit of Frank Lloyd Wright.

I hope to practice yoga this evening and then go to a Sisterhood Board Meeting.

I am grateful to the Almighty for all that He has given me.

I am being kind to myself.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR SELF-CARE AND SELF-COMPASSION

I am grateful to the Almighty because I am learning about self-care and self-compassion.

I am learning to feel for myself and understand myself and acknowledge when I am in emotional pain.

Yesterday was a wonderful day with Dana and Seth.  It was quite a wonderful memory to buy the furniture for the baby and the Almighty has allowed me to live and enjoy this in good health.

Today I will meet with Rabbi Conn to plan the wedding and baby naming.  

I am grateful to the Almighty for teaching me to understand myself emotionally.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR GETTING STRONGER

I am grateful to the Almighty because I feel that I am getting stronger.

Yesterday was the Sabbath and I had a wonderful day filled with amazing activities......services....meditation........walking and I even made dinner!!!

Today I will practice yoga and will meditate.

I will be picking up Dana and Seth at the Hicksville Railroad Station at 1.  We will be having lunch and then shopping for baby furniture.

I have lived to see this day and I'm very excited.  It's also a tough day....BUT......the Almighty will help me to get stronger with each passing day.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR BEING ABLE TO CHANGE DIRECTIONS

I am grateful to the Almighty because He sent me to practice yoga and it was there that I learned to change directions if something isn't working.

I have done this very often in my life, most recently with my daughters and I am healthier as a result of this.

Today is the Sabbath and I am getting ready for services.

I will walk today.

I will read.

I will practice meditation.

I am grateful to the Almighty for all that He has given me in life.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR USING YOGA AND MEDITATION IN REAL LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty because He sent me to yoga and meditation and I have been using them  in real life.

Yesterday I practiced in Elyses class and she spoke of twists and how life twists you up and how you have to learn to get out of those twists.

I also meditated yesterday and thought about the false pictures that I take and believe in.  The saying that is very important is:  "Please make it disappear."

I've been having issues with those so called daughters of mine.  Inheriting psychopathology from a grandmother and having him as a step-father doesn't help.  I have been using yogic and meditation principles and it really helps.

Today I will practice yoga, get my hair blown out and have therapy with Kera.

My new book is good and another one comes today.

Tonight is erev Shabbat.

Thank you Almighty for watching over me.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR PEACE

I am grateful to the Almighty for the peace in my life.

Last night I came home from dinner with Rhonnie and a Sisterhood Book Club with a feeling of peace and quiet.   I was so grateful!!!!

This morning I will practice yoga and meditate.

H20 is coming to turn off the sprinkler.

I will clean the house too!!

I do these things with a feeling of peace and contentment.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR SELF-LOVE

I am grateful to the Almighty because He has taught me to love myself.

The Fall Holidays are over.  Each one was more joyous than the next.  I enjoyed them to the fullest.  I prayed for a healthy and happy year for myself and my family.  I hope that the Almighty has heard my prayers.

There was an altercation with Dana yesterday.  She was going to force me to host Thanksgiving in the same manner that It used to do.......Intimidation and that's not going to happen ever again!!!

Today I will practice mediation and yoga.  There are chores to do and Judith to see.

I'm having dinner with friends and going to the Sisterhood Book Club tonight.

I am grateful to the Almighty fr my new life.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR SELF-CARE

I am grateful to the Almighty because I am learning to take care of myself.

This morning I will be heading to services to enjoy the last Fall holiday......SIMCHAT TORAH.

I will be coming home to Matzah and a house that is CALM, QUIET and PEACEFUL.

I am grateful to the Almighty for my health and my happiness.  The holidays are over and they were wonderful.

I hope and pray that the Almighty grants me as well as my little family  a Healthy and Happy New Year.

Thank you!!

I am grateful!!

GRATEFUL FOR MY QUIET LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty for the quiet and calm life that I now have.

Today and Tuesday are the final Fall Jewish holidays.

I was really tired today and I slept later.  I will pray at home.  It dawned on me that I COULD NEVER DO THAT BEFORE.

Later......

I did pray at home and t was so meaningful.  I even said the prayers that Rabbi Jay gave me and that was amazingly meaningful for Yizkor.

It meant so much to me to be allowed to sleep, to be at home in the calm and quiet.  I was never able to do this and I am so grateful for the peace and quiet.  I was able to walk, to read, to talk to friends and to prepare for the final Fall holiday......Simach Torah!!!

I am grateful to the Almighty for this.

Thank you.....

GRATEFUL FOR A POSITIVE ATTITUDE

I am grateful to the Almighty because I woke up with a positive attitude today.

I know who I really am!!!!

I practiced yoga in Doreen's class and then headed to the Collation that PJC was giving to Cantor Judith Berkson which had a reception afterwards.  It was extremely enjoyable. I sat with friends and discussed MahJong.  I purchased a mezuzah for my new little granddaughter who is due in January.  Then it was off to drop Matzah at Petco for a bath and grooming on onwards to Trader Joe's.

I went to Athleta too.  I was able to "purchase" three heavy yoga tops because of my points.

I picked up Matzah from Petco and he looked wonderful.

I called Karen too.

Tonight is the beginning of the last of the Fall Jewish holidays.

I'm  making chicken for dinner.

I lit candles, said my blessings and had dinner quietly and calmly.

I am grateful to the Almighty for my positive attitude and knowing who I am.

I am grateful for my quiet life.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR SEEING WHO I REALLY AM

I am grateful to the Almighty because through His sending me to yoga I have begun to see who I am.

I'm a beautiful, strong, bright, independent and capable woman!!!!

Today I will attend services and participate in the Sukkah Hop.

Later:

The Sukkah Hop turned into a bust.  There was PJC's Sukkah and one other because of the bomb cyclone earlier in the weekend that knocked down my barbecue.

I came home to relax, read and walk.

Later........

It's a beautiful day.   And I took a 2 hour walk!!!

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful!!!!

GRATEFUL FOR A BEAUTIFUL NEW DAY

I am grateful to the Almighty for this beautiful new day.

All is quiet in my home and in my backyard.  Everything is in place.  Gone is that barbecue and its horrible memories.

Yesterday I had my hair colored and blown out.  I cleaned the house.  I did errands.  In the evening I went to dinner at Pasteria which I thoroughly enjoyed.

Today I will practice yoga.  I will speak with Judith and then go to Fairway.

Tonight is the Sabbath!!!  A day of rest and tomorrow is the Sukkah Hop!!!

Thank you Almighty for this beautiful day.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR ALL THE JOY IN MY LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty for all the joy in my life.

Last night we had a major nor'easter with tremendous wind and rain.  I heard a loud "boom" in the middle of the night and thought the power was off.  I wasn't worried as I have a generator BUT it turned out to be the old barbecue which flew down the deck stairs and crashed.  I immediately called Freddy and he knew exactly what to do.  The barbecue is gone along with any memories of "It" grilling and bringing in food raw.  I am so grateful not to have to see this again.  I believe that it is the will of the Almighty.

Today I will clean the house and have my hair colored and blown out.  More purple is coming.

Tonight I will take myself out for dinner.

I am grateful to the Almighty for the joy in my life.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR NEW ADVENTURES IN MY LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty for all the new adventures in my life.

Today is the third Art Tour.  I am excited because we are going to The Brooklyn Museum to see the PIERRE CARDIN: FUTURE FASHION exhibit as well as THE DINNER PARTY by JUDY CHICAGO.

Dana is meeting me there.  That too is very exciting!!!!


More to come later........................


The day was a wonderful day even though it was raining.  I was with all my friends.  Dana arrived and we had fun.  It gave me a chance to show off my pregnant daughter.  The exhibits were really good.....and very enjoyable.

I even got to do some food shopping on the day home.

I am grateful to the Almighty for my wonderful day.

Thank you!!!

GRATEFUL FOR A WONDERFUL HOLIDAY

I am grateful to the Almighty for the wonderful holiday of Sukkot that I am having.

I enjoy the prayers.  I enjoy the fact that I can feel the presence of the Almighty as I pray.
I don't have to worry about strategies to be safe.

I enjoy the Rabbi.  I enjoy his speeches and  enjoy speaking to him.

I enjoy the Sukkah.  I no longer have to hide from people in the Sukkah who judge me based on what the creature or my girls did.

I enjoy walking on a beautiful day.

I enjoy my home.   I enjoy a glass of wine with Matzah on the deck even though the summer season is over and Freddy has put the furniture away.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful for all that you have given me.

GRATEFUL FOR A PEACEFUL SUKKOT

I am grateful to the Almighty for the PEACE and QUIET that I'm feeling on Sukkot.

The holidays are flying by because it is peaceful, calm and quiet in my home.

I find it so wonderful to get up and stretch and actually be tired in the morning because I can.  There ain't nothing to keep me wired.

Today is the first day of the Sukkot holiday and  will be at services.

I will return home to read....to relax and just maybe if the weather is better.......to walk.

Thank you Almighty for my PEACE and QUIET.

I am grateful.

PS.  I walked for 2 hours at different times because I could.

GRATEFUL FOR THE PEACE IN MY LIFE

I am grateful for the peace and calm in my life.

I sat outside with a glass of wine and endgame looking at my Zen Garden and the squirrels and birds.  I sat outside with Matzah right before lighting candles.  I have NEVER known such peace and contentment.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR THE BREATHE

I am grateful to the Almighty for the calm and quiet way that I feel.

It is reflected in my deep, calm, quiet breathes.

Yesterday was quite a nice day.  Matzah went for a re-check and has to return again in 2 weeks. Freddy came and we still have not determined where the squeaky nose is coming from.  I did get to walk.  I finished THE HANDMAID'S TALE and will begin the sequel THE TESTAMENTS  today.  It was a beautiful evening and I did get to sit outside with a glass of wine.

Today my new washing machine will be arriving.  This afternoon Freddy will be back to begin the Fall chores.

Tonight SUKKOT will begin.

I am grateful to the Almighty because I am calm and happy with a smile on my face.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR LEARNING TO LOVE MYSELF

I am grateful to the Almighty because I practiced yoga in Leslie's class yesterday and she spoke of learning to love yourself.

This is a wonderful concept because it says that you put yourself first.   I've never done that because I was psychologically abused and always looking for someone's love.  It's time to love myself first.

And I did that yesterday.  All of the discussion was done by texting.  It seems that the week that was chosen for Seth's parents to come in in the Spring is May 27-29.....SHAVOUT!!!  That ONLY leaves them one day to pay a wedding in a Rabbi's study.  THIS IS NOT MY PROBLEM.  Hilary suggested a local Rabbi.  Dana said they knew one on the Upper East Side. I AGREED WITH EVERYTHING!!!  IT'S NOT MY PROBLEM!!!  The end result is that I will ask my Rabbi and my friend Jay if they can perform this.  If they can't IT'S NOT MY PROBLEM!!!!

Today Matzah is going to the vet for a re-check and Freddy is coming.

I hope to walk although I'm not sure but I will finish my book.

Thank you Almighty for teaching me to love myself.

I am grateful!!!

GRATEFUL FOR SLOWING DOWN

I am grateful to the Almighty because He sent me to yoga yesterday and Margaret taught us to slow down and appreciate the moment.

I am grateful to the Almighty for this because the list of things that I do in one day is huge.

Today, however, I will practice yoga, have my hair blown out and and finish my Fairway shopping.

Tonight is the beginning of the Sabbath.  I'm making chicken for dinner.

I am grateful to the Almighty for my life, my health, my happiness.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR A NEW DAY

I am grateful to the Almighty for a new day.  

I am healthy.  I am happy.  I am proud of myself because Yom Kippur was a huge success.

Today I'm up early to practice yoga and walk at The Home Depot.  The weather is horrible......lots of rain.

I have many chores to do too.  I'm going to clean the house and drop clothes at the laundromat.

I am treating myself to a manicure and dinner out too.

I am grateful to the Almighty for everything tat He has done for me.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR AN AMAZING YOM KIPPUR

I am grateful to the Almighty for standing by me all my life.

I prayed really hard this Yom Kippur.  Last year I was in the process of imploding.  This year I'm me!!!!  The weather was awful!!  I arrived at PJC and prayed my heart out!  I allowed myself to drive and be conservative turning on lights so I don't break my neck.

I came home after shower blowing and had "breakfast" and the two cups of DD decaf that I brought home.  Tomorrow it's back to regular coffee for me.

I was a beautiful holiday filled with friends who sat near me.  The Rabbi said that the inspiration for his sermon was "ME."  Wow!!!!

Thank you Almighty for always being with me.  I hope that I will be SEALED IN THE BOOK OF LIFE!

Thank you!!!

GRATEFUL FOR LEARNING ABOUT FALSE DREAMS

I am grateful to the Almighty because He sent me to therapy and I finally understand that my sorrow comes from false dreams about the past.

Ridding myself of these false dreams  is a process and I will have to be patient to rid myself of these dreams.

Today I hope to practice yoga, walk and have my hair blown out.

Tonight is Kol Nidre and tomorrow is Yom Kippur.  I hope that the Almighty seals me in the Book of Life for a Healthy and Happy New Year.

I thank you Almighty for being there for me.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR THE SHANTI IN MY LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty for the "Shanti" in my life.

My life is peaceful, calm and quiet.

Today my kitchen chair is coming between 8AM and 10AM.  Remember one had been broken?

I hope to be able to walk and practice yoga.  I will be going to the bank and post office too.

I will be seeing Judith today.

Later I will have dinner with friends at Pasteria and play MahJong at my home.

Life is peaceful.

I am grateful to the Almighty for this.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR LEARNING ABOUT MY OWN NEEDS

I am grateful to the Almighty because through yoga I am finally understanding to care about my own needs.

My older daughter, husband and baby rented a car to visit the creature's grave.  Did I have to take them to dinner?  Absolutely not!!!!!  They NEVER came out to the house and saw what I've done with it. They weren't coming now. She doesn't like the baby to see the dog because she said he's crazy.  I created a story and moved forward!!!  I'm proud of me!!

Would you believe that she texted me later telling me that the stone is beautiful and that I did a wonderful job!  What a psychopath that has narcissistic tendencies.

As the saying goes, if you don't create WELLNESS you'll get ILLNESS.

Today I slept later.  It's amazing how restful my sleep is now that I'm not being psychologically abused. I still do get crazy nightmares but this too shall pass.  My anxiety in the morning is the result of how I lived all my life.  I still practiced yoga and because the weather was inclement, I walked at The Home Depot.  I dropped off my bag of donations for the homeless at PJC and went to DD to buy coffee.  I read both newspapers and am now on the computer.

I have bills to pay too.

I want to go to Atleta later to cash in my bonus cards from credit cards.  And I did and I had beyond fun.  I called American Express and another gift card is on its way. 

I made a wonderful salad and tofu and veggies as my main dish with wine. Melon for desert.

Life is good.

Life is fun.

I'm grateful to the Almighty for helping me to learn that I too have needs.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR THE SABBATH

I am grateful to the Almighty because today is the Sabbath.

It has been a busy week although very enjoyable.

I will go to services in the morning.

I will read, walk and breathe.

Thank you Almighty for this special day.

I am grateful.

P.S.   I walked for over 2 hours!! Wow!!

GRATEFUL FOR SAVORING EVERY MOMENT

I am grateful to the Almighty because I practiced yoga in Elyse's class yesterday and she spoke of savoring each moment and making it extra ordinary.

That's a wonderful idea!!!

She also spoke of knowing who you are and that's something that I'm working on also.

Today in lieu of yoga I have a meeting at PJC.  We are planning a brunch to honor people, like myself, who have been members of the synagogue for 20 or more years.  Louis will blow out my hair.  I will do some food shopping.  I will walk too.

I am grateful to the Almighty for my extra ordinary life.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR SPEAKING MY TRUTH

I am grateful to the Almighty because He created me as a person who speaks their own truth.

However what I have learned is that when it comes to people with mental illness like my mother, the creature and my daughter one cannot speak the truth because that can only be used by them to upset me and satiate themselves.  Therefore it is important to learn to be quiet or to speak non-speak as in 1984 by George well, meaning that one speaks but it makes no sense.

I am doing that and enjoying it greatly.

Meanwhile, on a positive note, I went to P.C. Richards with Karen and ordered a washing machine to be delivered on October 13th.  I did however eat many cookies and must now return to my A1C program.  Today I will take laundry to the laundromat as well as walk and practice yoga and read.

I am grateful to the Almighty for all that I have learned.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR THE BREATHE

I am grateful to the Almighty because I can breathe deeply.

I can breathe in the joy of Rosh Hashanah.

I can breathe in the joys of days and holidays to follow.

I can breathe in new life.

I can breathe in good health.

This is the way Rosh Hashanah should have been.  I'm thrilled that the Almighty allowed me to be healthy, live and breathe in the awe of the holiday.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR A WONDERFUL ROSH HASHANAH

I am beyond grateful to the Almighty for the wonderful Rosh Hashanah holiday that I had.

It was beautiful.  It was spiritual.  It was everything that I hoped it would be.

Gone was the needling and bantering.  Gone were the beady eyes and angry looks and starring. Gone were the disrespect for the Holy Days as there was no more sleeping in bed instead of going to services or walking around PJC without praying.  Gone was the bending of thumbs.  Gone was saying "FUCK YOU" to me as it left.  Gone was the criticism of my food or of food I ordered in.  Gone was the disrespect and using technology during the Holy Days.  Gone was leaving early.

Instead there was peace and quiet.  I was able to pray and listen to a speech.  My friends could sit next to me.  I was able to smile.  I was able to listen to the new Cantor. I was able to listen to the Rabbi's speeches.  I was able to walk, read and eat a quiet dinner.  I was able to visit friends and walk with them. I was able to breathe in the joy of these Holy Days.

Thank you Almighty for this wonderful Rosh Hashanah.  I hope that all my prayers are answered.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR PEACE AND QUIET

I am grateful to the Almighty for the peace and quiet in my life.

Yesterday was an awesome day filled with self-care, peace and quiet.

Tonight is the beginning of the New Year, the Rosh Hashanah holiday.

I am so thrilled to be in this wonderful place filled with joy, peace and quiet.  I hope that my prayers are heard by the Almighty so that I might live a healthy and happy life filled with family and friends.

Thank you Almighty for this new peaceful, calm, quiet and spiritual life that you have given me.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR LEARNING ABOUT SELF-CARE

I am grateful to the Almighty because He sent me to practice yoga and through yoga I have learned about self-care.

I am beginning to understand who I am because I now have the space to breathe and to see who I am.  Truthfully, I am liking what I see.  I'm very proud of myself and my accomplishments.

Today I did not attend services.   I was tired from the entire week and I slept late!!!  I was able to do this because I have become aware of the need to take care of myself.  I also am smiling because I am safe in my own home and can rest if and when I want to.  There is no one here to psychologically abuse me.

I ate breakfast slowly.  I read the papers.  I said my prayers gratefully.  I'm going to walk and start reading The Handmaid's Tale.

I am so grateful to the Almighty for protecting me.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR LEARNING TO FORGIVE MYSELF

I am grateful to the Almighty because I practiced yoga in Elyse's class yesterday and she spoke of forgiving yourself.

I am always hard on myself and this is a lesson that I will begin to follow.

Yesterday was an interesting day.  It was filled with yoga and walking at The Home Depot since it was going to rain.

I also found a laundromat because my washing machine broke.  Karen and I set a date for Wednesday, October 2 to buy a washing machine.

I also had dinner with Gail, Rhonnie, and Linda.

Today I will again practice yoga and walk.  I'm getting my hair blown out too.  I finished reading Eleanor Oliphant and will return it to the library and begin The Handmaid's Tale.

Thank you Almighty for my new life.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR LISTENING TO MY HEART

I am grateful to the Almighty because He allowed me to practice yoga in Margaret's class yesterday. She has been teaching us about the chakras and today she discussed the heart chakra.

Be true to your heart.  Follow your heart.  This is what I am now learning.  I always led with my mind because that way I could be safe and survive.  Now I need to take care of me.  I need to follow my heart and not be so tough on myself and learn to love myself first.

Today I will walk and practice yoga.  I'm having dinner with friends tonight at the diner.

I'm going food shopping for the holidays.  I am looking forward to the spirituality of the Holy Days and being able to enjoy them in my new home.

I am grateful to the Almighty for this.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR A BEAUTIFUL NEW DAY

I am grateful to the Almighty for giving me this beautiful new day.

It is a day filled with all sorts of possibilities.

I will practice yoga, walk, and clean the house. I will do the wash.  I will read and relax.  I will read the newspapers and play with Matzah.

I will live in the present.

It will be a beautiful day.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR THE BALANCE IN MY LIFE

I practiced yoga in Leslie's class yesterday and she spoke of achieving balance in what we do.

That is what I'm trying to do.  I do housework.  I clean.  I shop.  I cook.  I play!!!

Today will be a day of play as it is the second ART TOUR and I am going to the CLOISTERS to see "The Colmar Treasure: A Medieval Jewish Legacy."  

I'm very excited.  I woke up at 6:15 to get ready!!!!  It is like a work day.  I will write more later.

The trip was absolutely wonderful.   I have friends to sit with, eat with and walk around with!!  The exhibits were wonderful!!!!  The bus ride was so much fun...

When I got home I was able to walk too!!!

I really enjoyed myself.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful that you are with me always.

GRATEFUL FOR HEARING LET'S DANCE

I am grateful to the Almighty because I practiced yoga in Doreen's class yesterday and she spoke of making a commitment to LET'S DANCE.

I took this to means let's enjoy the miracles in my life.

I'm trying to.

Yesterday I had the most amazing day with Dana.

Today I will practice yoga and walk.

Tonight I will be going to dinner with my Mahjong buddies and then we will play at my home.

All of this is a miracle and I am ready to dance.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR MIRACLES

I am grateful to the Almighty because I attended services yesterday as usual.

However yesterday Rabbi Conn spoke of miracles in ones life.  I realized that the calm and quiet was a miracle so much so that I was able to take a nap!!!  I walked for close to 2 hours.  I had wine on the deck with Matzah.  I spoke to friends.  I read my book.  What a wonderful Sabbath it was!!!!!

Today I will practice yoga and walk.  I'm picking up Dana at 12 from Hicksville to go maternity clothes shopping!!  I am truly blessed!!!!

I had a wonderful time with Dana.   This daughter has always been my heart!  We went to lunch at the new X Greek restaurant and maternity shopping.   We went to Starbucks for coffee and hung out on the deck until she went home in an Uber.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful for miracles.

GRATEFUL FOR EARNING ABOUT WAVES

I am grateful to the Almighty because I practiced yoga in Leslie's class and she spoke about the waves in our lives.

Heaven knows that there have been lots of waves in my life.

Thanks to the Almighty I have survived.

I am grateful.

Today I will attend services at PJC.   I will read.  I will walk.  I will "be"  in my own home.

Tonight is the beginning of the High Holiday season with the Selichot service which I will attend peacefully, calmly and quietly.

I am grateful to the Almighty for this.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR THE PEACE AND CALM IN MY LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty for the peace and calm in my life.

I am able to do so many wonderful things in one day because there is no fear in me anymore and no strategies for survival in my home.  I practiced yoga yesterday as well as did food shopping at Fairway.  I was able to walk, to have my hair colored to scrub the kitchen floor and bathroom tile as well as wash the floors, read and pay with Matzah.  I called friends too.  I was able to be and to breathe.

Today I will again practice yoga and walk.  I need to go to Woodbury Kosher and Trader Joe's. It's before the Sabbath.  Life is peaceful and quiet.

I am grateful to the Almighty for what He has given me.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR THE JOY IN MY LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty for all the joy in my life.

Yesterday while I practiced yoga in both Margaret's class and the Yoga Book Club, I found myself smiling when I think of Remi.

I found myself laughing and having fun when we played MahJong after going out to dinner. The game was held in my home and will continue to be held there.  I am so grateful!!!  You should have seen Matzah's tail wagging!!!!  And without knowing it, I won 2 games!!!!!

Today I will practice yoga and get my hair done.  Nick's going to put more purple in it.

Food shopping will follow.

Life is good.

I am grateful for the joy in my life.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR UNDERSTANDING SPACE

I am grateful to the Almighty because I practiced yoga in Elyse's class yesterday and she spoke of making space for yourself.

I am so grateful to the Almighty because I now can do "nothing" in my home.  There is space for me everywhere just "to be."  I can sit in the Yoga Room.  I can read in the Library or watch television or read in the bedroom, kitchen or deck.  I am so grateful for this.

I had a wonderful time visiting Remi yesterday.  I'm still smiling about this.  He has a wonderful sense of direction and navigated us all the way to Forest Park.  He was not happy with the ambulance....the noise scared him and it moved by itself.  He did love its wheels.

Today I will practice yoga and then participate in the Yoga Book Club.

Tonight is MahJong but we are all having dinner before the game which is in my home.

I am grateful to the Almighty for the life that He has given me.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR SEEING REMI TODAY

I am grateful to the almighty because after I practice yoga and walk, I will be taking Plainview Cab to see my grandson Remi.

I love that little guy!!!

Thank you Almighty for this wonderful visit.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR SELF-LOVE

I am grateful to the Almighty because I practiced yoga in Doreen's class and she spoke of self-love.

I was feeling a bit sad yesterday and that certainly helped me to take care of myself. 

Yesterday I practiced yoga and meditation.  I made it to Level 7.  I'm proud of me.  I went for a manicure/pedicure and had dinner on the deck with Matzah.  I also read my new book.  It turned out to be a very relaxing day.

Today I will practice yoga and walk at The Home Depot.

Todays a really cloudy/rainy day and so I will clean the house.

I am grateful that I m remembering to love myself.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR MY NEW LIFE

Thank you Almighty for my wonderful new life.

Today I will practice yoga and meditation.  I will walk on this beautiful day.

This afternoon I will get a manicure/pedicure.

I will do some chores.

I am grateful to you for my new life.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR REMEMBERING MY STRENGTHS

I am grateful to the Almighty because I practiced yoga in Leslie's class yesterday and her theme was to remember your strengths.

I have done this all my life with the help of the Almighty.

I have planned a wonderful day today.......services.....walking.........meditation......reading.

What could be better?

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR LEARNING TO LOOK UP

I am grateful to the Almighty because He sent me to practice yoga yesterday and the teacher spoke about always looking up in your life.

That put into words what I try to do each day and I was grateful to hear this.

My periodontal checkup went well and I was able to complete all the errands that I set out for myself.

Today I will practice yoga and Louis will blow out my hair.  Food shopping will follow.

It's a beautiful day and I will look up and appreciate it.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR SEEING LIFE A NEW WAY

I am grateful to the Almighty because I see life a new way.

I don't fear it.  I can enjoy it.

There still are some vestiges of sadness in the morning but I'm working on it.

However I constantly look up to enjoy my life.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR THE CHANGES IN ME

I am grateful to the Almighty for the changes that I see in myself.

I am no longer split down the middle creating survival strategies to be safe and grateful that I survived to fight another day.

I am one person with one life inside my home and outside of it.

Today a friend, who could never pick me up because of him, is coming to pick me up to have dinner before the Sisterhood Book Club.

We had a wonderful dinner at Pasteria filled with conversation and laughs and then a great discussion at the book club.

I am home now....happy.....healthy and calm.

I am grateful to the Almighty for this.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR FOLLOWING WHAT MY HEART NEEDS

I am grateful to the Almighty because I practiced yoga yesterday and learned that I must follow what my heart needs in order to avoid stress and tension.

Yesterday was an amazing day.  I cleaned the entire house.  I practiced yoga.  I walked for 2 hours.  I read. I spoke to my friends and to my daughters.  I had a drink on the deck with Matzah.  I read. I'm proud of me.

Today I'm going on the first Sisterhood Art Tour of Fall 2019.  I'm really excited.  I am going to the NY Historical Society where I will see an exhibit called LIFE: SIX WOMEN PHOTOGRAPHERS and another exhibit called: BEYOND MIDNIGHT: PAUL REVERE. I'm really excited.

I had a wonderful day and I thank the Almighty for it.  The exhibits were wonderful and I had friends to walk with and eat lunch with.  There were so many exhibits.  There was one on STONEWALL that started the entire gay movement.  There was one on TIFFANY LAMPS.  There was one on a PANORAMIC NYC.

The bus ride was wonderful.

Thank you so much Almighty.

I am so grateful.  My heart needed to know that I am healed and I am grateful to you because you healed me.

GRATEFUL FOR A BEAUTIFUL NEW DAY

I am grateful to the Almighty for a beautiful new day.

I love the peace and quiet of the mornings.

I love my morning routine.

I love the day as it unfolds with chores, exercise, yoga, walking.........

I love the peace in my home.

I love dinner on the deck with Matzah.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR THE JOY IN MY LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty for all the joy that He has given me.

From services to walking to dinner on the deck with Matzah, everything is calm, quiet, spiritual and peaceful.

Today I will again meditate and practice yoga.

I'm walking.

There are chores to do, newspapers to read and dinner on the deck.

There are friends to connect with.  There is a Yoga Book Club book to compete.

I am grateful to the Almighty for all that He has given me.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR CLOSURE

I am grateful to the Almighty because I had closure with my abuser.   I went to see his grave and read what I had written.  I walked away.  I'm done.  I will never see that grave again.

On a much brighter note, I went to the F.R.E.E. Breakfast yesterday and had a wonderful time. Peruvian food followed for lunch with a Baskin Robbins 3 scoop sundae!!!!   Today I will start watching what I eat.  I'm going to Dr. Vezza in December.

Today I will go to services, walk and generally relax.

Thank you Almighty for closure.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR A GOOD LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty because He has given me a good life.

Last night I went out to dinner with my yoga friend Marilyn.  We closed Morrison's down.

This morning my friend Frank has created a F.R.E.E. group of BOCES retirees.  We all like each other and have known each other for years.  We are having breakfast in the Celebrity Diner.

Karen and I will be going to the cemetery so that I can have closure with the creature.

I wrote something to say and then will NEVER go there again.

I am grateful to the Almighty because my life is good and moving forward.

Thank you.


PS  The breakfast was awesome.  When I went to the cemetery, I felt nothing for my abuser.  It's closure!!!!!

GRATEFUL FOR THE CHANGES IN MYSELF

I am grateful to the Almighty for the changes in myself.  I am grounded.  I know who I am.

I'm not the same person that I was last year.  I understand who I am and the people in my life.  I write off emotionally those people who are superficial and harmful to me.  I've learned to keep quiet about my life with the girls.  They were not supportive or helpful and I need to move on and I am thankful to the Almighty for looking out for me.

Yesterday I did some many wonderful things.  I practiced yoga.  I walked.  I did food shopping at Fairway.  I saw Judith.  I had dinner with Debbie and Rhonnie.  Then we played Mahjong.  It was a wonderful day.

Today I will again practice yoga and walk.  I'm having my hair blown out today because tomorrow my friend Frank has created a retirement breakfast for all the people that I love.  I'm getting a flu shot and the doggie is going to the veterinarian.   I hope to have dinner with my friend Marilyn.

I am grateful to the Almighty for helping me become the person that I was meant to be.

Thank you!

GRATEFUL FOR ACCEPTING THE JOURNEY OF LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty because I have accepted His will in the journey of life.

I am so grateful for the many things that the Almighty has given me: daughters, sons-in-law, and a grandson and a grand daughter to-be.  I have had a remarkable career and I have wonderful friends.

The part of the journey with the creature in it was difficult, BUT THE REST OF THE LIFE IS WONDERFUL!   The abusers are gone.

Yesterday I was able to walk and practice yoga.  I had such with Zita.  I went to a really good Sisterhood meeting where I facilitated the SIMCHA CAKE.  I was asked out to dinner for tonight by Rhonnie and Debbie.  I'm going.

Today is also busy.....yoga....meditation.....walking.......and then I have to go to Gutterman's for the directions to the cemetery.  The stone is in and it will be closure for me.  I wrote my thoughts to say at the stone.

Dinner and MahJong tonight!!!!

I am grateful to the Almighty for understanding life's journey and accepting it.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR UNDERSTANDING CHANGE

I am grateful to the Almighty because I am beginning to understand the concept of change as something positive in my life.

The Plainview pool season is over and Fall will begin soon with the Jewish holidays.

I look forward to the changes that the season will bring.

Today I will practice yoga and have lunch with my friends.

I hope to walk too.

I need to make a vet appointment for Matzah and change a hair appointment.

Tonight is the first Sisterhood meeting of the year and I'm in charge of the Simcha cake.

Thank you Almighty for the change in season and the new life that I have.

I am grateful.

GRATEFUL FOR GIVING MYSELF PERMISSION........

I am grateful to the Almighty because I took the All Levels yoga class at the studio this morning.  It's Labor Day and there was only one class.  Hollie said that I did "great."

I learned that I need to take care of myself.   I learned to give myself permission.  I will do that right now.  I GIVE MYSELF PERMISSION TO BE PROUD OF MYSELF.  I accomplished a great deal in my life and I'm very proud of me.  I GIVE MYSELF PERMISSION TO BE CONTENT WITH MYSELF.

Each day I will give myself permission to........

I walked at The Home Depot because the weather is horrible.  I was not triggered at all by this and I am grateful that I moved forward.

I practiced meditation and am happy to say that I'm in Level 6.

I am grateful to the Almighty for the good in my life.

Thank you.

GRATEFUL FOR THE JOY IN MY NEW LIFE

I am grateful to the Almighty because He has given me the best summer of my life.

Friends came to my house.

I went to dinner with friends.

I hosted book clubs and MahJong.

I went to the pool and hung out with friends.

I practiced mediation and yoga.

I read.  I attend book discussions.

Life was calm, quiet and wonderful.  I could breathe.  The abusers were gone.  There would be no more of that.  Even the older daughter and the brother who inherited this can be dealt with by not responding to anything.

Thank you Almighty.

I am grateful.